I love to work out. Yes, I know I used LOVE and WORK OUT in the same sentence. Sometimes I don't feel like it, but I have never regretted getting off my butt and doing it.
Last week I had a rough day. It was one of those days where everything just went wrong. It wasn't about what went wrong per se, but that so much went wrong at the same time on the same day. By the time 5pm came, I had to decide if I was going to change and go to my usual Zumba class. If you are not familiar with Zumba, I will explain it quickly. It is a high energy, fast moving, dance class where you move to all sorts of Latin rhythms or what I call happy music.
It's hard to muster up the energy to take that class when you feel nothing that resembles happy and even less when you are downright miserable.
Let me rewind a bit. Last month while at my Zumba class and while on a typical, happy day for me, I had a conversation with a friend from class. She was so excited. Her son (my age) had come to visit her. She gushed as to how happy it made her to spend such quality time with him and how proud she was of him and his new business. How he was dating this new fantastic girl, and they would probably be married soon. I was really enjoying the story. I was reeeeeeeeeally feeling her excitement. I am very sensitive to what others are feeling and can often feel it when they are standing close to me (I know, weird....but I digress). This was during a dance break. When she turned around to start dancing again, I was still smiling just so very happy for her. Then it hit me. I am NEVER going to have that with Kai. Don't know yet if I will with Quinn either. At best, Kai will be 40 and maybe begin to be phasing off his Mickey Mouse stage and moving on to Star Wars or other more appropriate "boy" categories I am not yet familiar with. He will probably be living with me. Will probably never get married. I will probably never have grandchildren.
It's not that I have not thought of this before, but it's that it just all hit me at that moment. Everything that autism has and will steal from me was playing in my head like a bad movie. Music started playing, and I had to fight back the tears. To make matters worse, this was the song playing:
It is a BACHATA version of "Stand by me." I actually don't really enjoy bachata. It's my least favorite style from my classes, but it was the song that affected me. I followed my adorable peppy instructor, but I had tears down my face. Lame but I could not help what I was feeling. Of course, I will stand by my sons, but it did not make it any easier to digest. Luckily the song stopped playing, and we moved on to another song and thankfully a much much higher energy one. Phew! Thank God for Pitbull and my ability to recover from being sad so quickly. Phew.
That class behind me, here I was last week considering if to attend class on a day when I was feeling rock bottom. I changed, put on my sneakers and arrived at class. I had no energy, no smile and was already thinking this had been a bad bad mistake. Everyone was in such a good mood that day. Gym friends all said cheery hellos and class started. Somewhere between my half ass merengue and weak reggaeton routine I noticed a girl in the back of the class. She was wearing a scarf over her head. Wait, I knew her. This is a girl that is always in class but now she has no hair and instead of being in the front of the class, she was hiding out in the back of the class. OMG! What happened? Cancer? Something like it? I thought. My heart sank and in that instant everything was put into perspective. Yes, things were really bad that day for me. Yes, there are days when my life just sucks and the future seems bleak but at least I have "life". This girl was probably fighting something completely different than I was but she was also going through her own pain and yet, here she was. She might have been in the back but she was rocking Shakira and Willy Chirino while I was self pitying during the songs. Just like that, I got over it. She inspired me to see the big picture that day. She reminded me that not all is lost and although things still hurt, we gain more by being positive than by rotting in negativity. We all have pain and we all have hurdles. It's about acknowledging it, feeling it, then putting it to rest (until the next time) and moving on.
My husband's response to me always saying "things could be worse" is usually " yeah but they can be much better too". He's right but since we can't control some aspects of our lives we need to focus on what we can and that's our attitude. It's all how you look at it.
For now at least, I have regained perspective and I am ready to keep rocking my Zumba class with a smile on my face regardless of what is going on in my life and class that day. I leave you in the company of Cuban genius Celia Cruz and her 2nd famous words "RIE, LLORA, que a cada cual le toca su hora" (loose translation: LAUGH, CRY because each one of us has our time)
That class behind me, here I was last week considering if to attend class on a day when I was feeling rock bottom. I changed, put on my sneakers and arrived at class. I had no energy, no smile and was already thinking this had been a bad mistake. Everyone was in such a good mood that day. Gym friends all said cheery hellos and class started. Somewhere between my half-ass merengue and weak reggaeton routine, I noticed a girl in the back of the class. She was wearing a scarf over her head. Wait, I knew her. This is a girl that is always in class, but now she has no hair, and instead of being in the front of the class, she was hiding out in the back. OMG! What happened? Cancer? Something like it? I thought. My heart sank and in that instant everything was put into perspective. Yes, things were really bad that day for me. Yes, there are days when my life just sucks, and the future seems bleak, but at least I have "life." This girl was probably fighting something completely different than I was but she was also going through her own pain and yet, here she was. She might have been in the back, but she was rocking Shakira and Willy Chirino while I was self-pitying during the songs. Just like that, I got over it. She inspired me to see the big picture that day. She reminded me that not all is lost and although things still hurt, we gain more by being positive than by rotting in negativity. We all have pain, and we all have hurdles. It's about acknowledging it, feeling it, then putting it to rest (until the next time) and moving on.
My husband's response to me always saying "things could be worse" is usually "yeah but they can be much better too." He's right but since we can't control some aspects of our lives we need to focus on what we can, and that's our attitude. It's all how you look at it.
For now, at least, I have regained perspective, and I am ready to keep rocking my Zumba class with a smile on my face regardless of what is going on in my life and class that day. I leave you in the company of Cuban genius Celia Cruz and her second famous words "RIE, LLORA, que a cada cual le toca su hora" (loose translation: LAUGH, CRY because each one of us has our time)
Azucar!
Thursday, December 1, 2011
Monday, November 7, 2011
An autism Halloween
I love October. It's one of those rare times in Florida that the air actually starts to change. The light breeze goes from 95 degrees to 80. Ok, it's not much, but I will take it. (a gentle reminder that South Floridians break out the parkas at the mere mention of the weather dropping to 75. True story)
This year Kai (9) was Batman. Quinn (2) was Robin. Kai has been a Hershey's Kiss, Superman, army soldier, clown, Incredibles, fireman, soccer player, and Peter Pan. Quinn is still too little to protest it. Most of those costumes listed have no hats or masks, and if even if they did, they were worn for a split second as I snapped a photo and were never to be seen again. He must think I am nuts. I mean, why can't he wear his tee and shorts like every day? Why can't he just be? What fun is it to wear weird itchy clothing? I guess I can see his point. My rule of thumb for holidays is this: as long as I get ONE photo, the rest can go awry, and I won't care. At least, I try to stick to that.
 |
| I got the one photo! |
The other BIG issue? Candy. They do not eat candy and don't care for it. They have been on a gluten/casein/yeast/soy/peanut free diet for the longest time. Although some candy falls into those categories, we just don't give him any. It's annoying to me that our standards are so low for our kids' diets. By "our" I mean, society in general. Peek into any kids school on a holiday party, and you will find 3 puffed Cheetos, a cupcake, and a handful of chips on their plates accompanied by some juice. That's all they eat for lunch. I wonder why they could not concentrate in class and were hyperactive? That's how they spend the day until they get home and "hopefully" eat a well-balanced meal. Insert eye roll here when I say "hopefully" because I would dare say, it mostly does not happen. Need to point out that this goes for all kids: autism or not. If it was only truly just on holidays, but it happens more often than not without the holiday excuse. Not saying that had Kai not had autism he would not eat that once in a while, but I would make sure it would be only following a nutritious lunch. Is that so hard to do? But I digress...
As it turns out, this year Kai was successful in repeatedly donning his Batman for not one, not two but three Halloween parties! That was huge. Did I mention the Batman costume has a mask? I even think it was the first time he understood that going to a "Halloween party" entailed "conditions" (costumes). When his teacher sent a note home asking for "special" items to be sent to school on Halloween such as candy, pastries, chips, juice, etc. I sent a note back saying "no thanks," and that was the end of that dilemma. I still cannot comprehend how they want to feed sweets to a classroom of kids with autism whose behavior will most likely deteriorate immediately afterward. Kills me.
Halloween night we briefly attempted to go to a friend's house. It was a little rowdy for our taste. Kai was all over the place. Quinn (who is not walking yet) was just crawling all over the place with his little hands picking up all the dirt from under people's shoes and then putting his hand in his mouth. Did I mention I am neurotic about limiting the baby's germ exposure? I swear I am pretty normal otherwise. Ha!
We hit a big wall when we attempted to trick or treat. Here is Kai, being prompted to trick or treat for something he does not understand (since he does not know or eat candy). Why do we even make him do it? So he can "fit in"? So that we have a sense of "normal"? After he attempted to enter a couple of strangers houses looking for what I can only guess is the location of their computer, I called it a night. Here were these poor people offering Kai candy and all he did was push through them and stretch his neck hoping to find a computer or something to play with. Oy! Never again.
Next year I think we will have the boys dress at home and participate in giving the candy to the trick or treaters that come to our house instead. It's more fitting for our lifestyle. We don't do candy, but you do, and we want to celebrate with the world so here, take it all and enjoy! This way they will also get to interact without the confusion of asking for something they don't eat. Makes much more sense and I think I have finally made some peace with it. Bring on Halloween 2012.
And now time to tackle an autism Christmas.
It never ends does it?
How was your Halloween?
From wine to whine...
The hubby and I took a much-needed break this last month and visited some Napa Valley wineries. Heaven. Wine has been our obsession recently. I think we have a found a way to deal with autism and developmental delays as a couple. No, not by drinking our sorrows (well, maybe a little). It is more of a shared hobby, an enjoyable one at that. We love learning all about the red wine.
We secured babysitting and away we went. Four days full of wine-ing and dining. We slept in on occasion too! What a concept. We are strong believers (now) that we must carve out time as a couple and individuals so that we can be better parents. Tired parents are less patient and not as clear headed. On the last night, we took the red-eye flight from San Francisco. The flight left at midnight west coast time and arrived at 8am east coast time. My husband jumped right into work, and I jumped into therapies, diapers, and the OTHER type of WHINING. The days of the right kind of wine-ing were forgotten within 15 minutes of setting foot inside the house.
We dove into our usual Tuesday slavedom that is Quinn's new program. Four hours of a "mommy and me meets preschool" type of class where the moms follow the kids around and do exciting things like table tasks and sensory stations. Kill me now. As a second timer (did plenty of rounds with Kai, now 9) this time around with Quinn (28 months) is excruciating. I wish I was taking him to the zoo, the Seaquarium, the park or just on regular playdates. Instead, every morning is filled with a different therapy. The joy. Speech therapy back to back with physical therapy back to back with ABA therapy and on the other days? The preschool classes. I also have to listen to all the mothers, myself included, pronounce all the words with sing-song intonation, give cheerful compliments (for 4 hours) and listen to the kids that have had it and scream the entire time. I know it's part of the process. I know those moms would rather be elsewhere as well. Finding the energy to carry on as enthusiastic as the first-timers is hard though. It helps that I have days of wine-ing to look forward to.
We are still six months away from his Quinn's 3rd birthday. Most importantly, we are still under the glaring possibility of an autism diagnosis which will make this the 2nd round for us. Not saying that will happen but we are still under that "window." Until that window closes and we have a green light of no autism, my stress level will be considerably high. We are working hard towards escaping that autism diagnosis. We are doing everything in our power, but there are days, like today, that I feel like it's not enough. This is where my whining comes in. Who am I kidding, I was talking about me the entire time I mentioned whining, not the kids.
I am whining about it yes. Things could be worse, but they can also be so much better. I can fill in the blank with a lot of "at leasts" Yes, at least I have this and that yadda yadda. The thing is, nothing matters unless you and your family have health. Plain and simple. Health is the single most important factor in our lives. With health, you can do anything. Who cares if we can go to Napa if we would trade it in a heartbeat for our children to have a typical childhood. Shoot, they don't even have to be really smart. Just average. We will take it. Even C students! Detention? Great!
Until then, I am grateful we do our getaways and adult nights. Without them we would only be enveloped in a sea of depression, surrounded by pecs schedules, evaluation appointments, doctor's visits, and well-meaning ABC singing mothers at therapy sessions.
It's Monday, but I am already counting down to the weekend when we can relax and have more whine over wine time. It's what keeps us going.
Cheers!
We dove into our usual Tuesday slavedom that is Quinn's new program. Four hours of a "mommy and me meets preschool" type of class where the moms follow the kids around and do exciting things like table tasks and sensory stations. Kill me now. As a second timer (did plenty of rounds with Kai, now 9) this time around with Quinn (28 months) is excruciating. I wish I was taking him to the zoo, the Seaquarium, the park or just on regular playdates. Instead, every morning is filled with a different therapy. The joy. Speech therapy back to back with physical therapy back to back with ABA therapy and on the other days? The preschool classes. I also have to listen to all the mothers, myself included, pronounce all the words with sing-song intonation, give cheerful compliments (for 4 hours) and listen to the kids that have had it and scream the entire time. I know it's part of the process. I know those moms would rather be elsewhere as well. Finding the energy to carry on as enthusiastic as the first-timers is hard though. It helps that I have days of wine-ing to look forward to.
We are still six months away from his Quinn's 3rd birthday. Most importantly, we are still under the glaring possibility of an autism diagnosis which will make this the 2nd round for us. Not saying that will happen but we are still under that "window." Until that window closes and we have a green light of no autism, my stress level will be considerably high. We are working hard towards escaping that autism diagnosis. We are doing everything in our power, but there are days, like today, that I feel like it's not enough. This is where my whining comes in. Who am I kidding, I was talking about me the entire time I mentioned whining, not the kids.
I am whining about it yes. Things could be worse, but they can also be so much better. I can fill in the blank with a lot of "at leasts" Yes, at least I have this and that yadda yadda. The thing is, nothing matters unless you and your family have health. Plain and simple. Health is the single most important factor in our lives. With health, you can do anything. Who cares if we can go to Napa if we would trade it in a heartbeat for our children to have a typical childhood. Shoot, they don't even have to be really smart. Just average. We will take it. Even C students! Detention? Great!
Until then, I am grateful we do our getaways and adult nights. Without them we would only be enveloped in a sea of depression, surrounded by pecs schedules, evaluation appointments, doctor's visits, and well-meaning ABC singing mothers at therapy sessions.
It's Monday, but I am already counting down to the weekend when we can relax and have more whine over wine time. It's what keeps us going.
Cheers!
Wednesday, November 2, 2011
The Happy Camper
Spring! Well, it's not spring anymore, but we live in South Florida, and it's always HOT! (translation for: I started writing this months ago but just finished it now)
What better way to celebrate than to enroll our Nemo into swimming lessons?
That's what we did several months ago. These were not your typical ones either. These were for kids on the spectrum who already knew how to swim. They were to be taught the proper techniques for strokes so that they could swim laps: forwards and back.
I enrolled Kai and spoke to the camp director. I was excited and made sure Kai knew exactly where we were going and why. He seemed excited as well. Not sure he got what was to be taught but if it involved water, he was game.
The class was supposed to begin at 3:15. Naturally, arriving at 3:00pm was not a good idea. He was very anxious, and the waiting was hard on him. At 3:10pm they decided to begin since the kids were stimming by the minute. There were about 10 kids and 5 instructors.
And so the problems began right away. One of the lifeguards in the water, we will call her Maggy, was instructed to stay with Kai until it was "his turn." The instructors then took turns with the kids doing their thing. There was a little girl we will call Lilly. "Lilly, what a great job you are doing!" said the head instructor. She had been in the water 2 minutes and was showing off her gloriously learned strokes already. "Way to go Lilly" called out another instructor from afar. Gee, I sure hope my Kai learns all of that at camp. So awesome!
Kai was not being taught so he would go to the edge of the pool and jump in. In his world, this was awesome! Woohoo! He gets to splash and play, what's not to like? Well, if you ask the screaming camp director, lots. "Kai, no jumping in!" "I said, NO jumping!". What is happening here? I thought. No one told him not to jump in initially and screaming across the pool will not register with him. Have these people taught autism kids before? How about going up to him, looking him in the eye and telling him firmly what the rules are. "Lilly, that was awesome!" screamed another instructor. Then there was Nico. Nico had been having a "turn" and then asked to sit nicely while the other kids, not Kai, but the other kids had a turn. "Wow, Nico, you are doing such a great job, let's go back in again." Meanwhile, Maggy now had a soft hold on Kai so that he would not run off and jump in the pool. 3:23 rolled by, 23 minutes later, and Kai was STILL being held in the corner by Maggy and not one person had come to get him to "teach" him. He was actually being quite patient considering he was in the same spot with one person in the water doing absolutely nothing. This was just the first class.
Walked up to the main lifeguard, Lola, as she screamed at Kai who had managed to break free and was happily running into the pool via their beach entry. "No running!". Kai's "running" was more of feet flat, shuffling into the water than it was "running."
"Listen," I said, "if you need him not to run or jump in you are going to have to pull him aside in the water and explain it to him. It might take several times before he gets it. Screaming at him from far away will not do a single thing. He has no idea it's directed at him. Also, he has not been active since class started". "Great job Lilly!" called out yet another instructor from far away. Also, Lilly, Nico and most of the other kids have gone out several times, and no one has come to get Kai yet. "The reason he is off and doing his own thing is because there is nothing else for him to do! If someone was working with him he would not have been able to run off." "Ok" she replied."I will tell them something". Lola walked up to the head instructor and with her back to me repeats what I said. The instructor gets a look of "Oh no she didn't" and says to her "Well, that's not how it works around here." Repeat to thyself, patience, patience, patience.
Was this really happening? This is how it was mostly for 6 weeks. There were maybe 2 classes when he got a fair shot at swimming and instruction just like the other kids. That's it. Since this was a trial for me anyway and I had already paid (I thought it was non-refundable), I took it as a free play activity for my son, and I figured I was going to just attend and let it go. There were other incidences. The one that always upset me the most was just how much time alone he spent or getting screamed at for doing his own thing when not being "taught." I don't think it's rocket science. You either have the child with you to teach, or you don't. When they had him, he did great, and I have that on video. When they did not, he played on the beach entry or wanted to jump in (as he does at home and all the other schools and field trips he has attended). I also have that on video. He already knew how to swim, and this class was supposed to define those skills, but it never did.
At one point the camp was short staffed, and the director was on her cell phone on the lifeguard stand. My son was all alone by the entrance. It was a joke. In another instance, the director's grandson was in the water with our kids, and he was having "turns" too which took away from our kids. The day of the last class I discussed some of these concerns with another parent who agreed with some of it and had been oblivious to others. "Lilly's" mother overheard and "tattletaled" 4th-grade style to the director. I sat there in disbelief of what was going on. Now I could be wrong, but I saw her casually backup into my conversation with the other parent to get within earshot and then watched her hightail it to the director who was not happy. I don't care that she overheard because it's something I had already mentioned to them as a concern and something I would (and did) say to their face. "I tell you, that woman, from the first day..." is the most I lip read. Any chance this was not about me? Maybe. Or maybe not.
I have been a dance instructor all of my life. I have taught small, typical kids. I know all about being fair and making sure each child is paid attention to and taught. This was NOT the way things were done at this camp amongst other issues. I also know that there are days when you or your staff can be off, but if it's the majority of the time, then there is a problem.
When the six weeks were up, my son had learned NOTHING. I left and quietly decided to just let it go as another one of those "live and learn" autism experiences where a therapist or school is not as qualified to teach our kids. That was until a parent asked about this company on a Yahoo group to which I belong. I did not hesitate to write about my story to this parent and the other group members. I made sure to say that perhaps if you paid for a one to one their experience could be different. I did praise the instructor that worked with him for those precious 5-10 minutes of instruction in the 45-minute class span. This is a parent group where parents share their experiences with autism-related things such as therapies, therapy centers, teachers, therapists, community events, shadows, etc..Another parent who attended the same camp forwarded the info to the camp owner. I wonder who? Hmmmmm.
The thing is, I had been upset all summer, and I tried to keep a lid on it in an attempt to just deal with it patiently and give them more time to get it right or just finish the camp. But, now someone wanted an opinion. I have a right to give my opinion of a business. I was not a happy "camper." Pun fully intended. That is why there are places like Yelp!, Google search and Trip Advisor. People are free to express how their experiences were with any business.
The owner wrote me what I guess she thought was an intimidating later or a cease and decease type of thing. Ha! Really? Sorry, you weren't happy so now shut up about it? Not in a million years. I am not going to go out of my way to tell the world my experience, but if someone asks, I will. Did I mention my husband is an attorney? I know I was doing nothing wrong by sharing my experience. My son is 9. Can you imagine how much therapy and classes he has taken over the years? Not all has been perfect every time. With that said, need I state that every single teacher or therapist has always loved him to death for being such a great little boy AND student? This was the first time he had been ignored or scolded so much for no good reason. She was so blindly upset that a lot of points in her letter had nothing to do with what I wrote. I wish she would have just said something along the lines of "I apologize for your experience. I don't remember things happening that way. I wish we could have talked about this some more so that I could have made your experience at our camp a pleasurable one." THAT would have been an excellent way of telling me off! (since she is also entitled to her opinion...lol). I thought long and hard how to respond or if to just let it be. I responded briefly and just went over a couple of the points and how I disagreed. I kept it short and to the point. I knew it would probably fall on deaf ears (or eyes), but I just had to reply. Such a sad situation for all involved.
I don't like anything about autism. There are some things though that in cases like these are a blessing. The only happy camper in this situation was my son. He had/has no idea that the camp was supposed to be different. If I took him to that pool today, he would be ecstatic and be anxious to do the same thing all over again. For that, I am so happy. At the end of the day, HE is all that matters.
In an interesting turn of events, I enrolled Kai in an amazing summer camp weeks after that incident. This was a camp full of activities and one of the perks? He got to swim each day with the counselors. By the end of camp, my son was swimming correctly, forwards, backward and even underwater. To that I say BOOYAH! See what happens when you " teach"? Amazing isn't it? What a concept.
What better way to celebrate than to enroll our Nemo into swimming lessons?
That's what we did several months ago. These were not your typical ones either. These were for kids on the spectrum who already knew how to swim. They were to be taught the proper techniques for strokes so that they could swim laps: forwards and back.
I enrolled Kai and spoke to the camp director. I was excited and made sure Kai knew exactly where we were going and why. He seemed excited as well. Not sure he got what was to be taught but if it involved water, he was game.
The class was supposed to begin at 3:15. Naturally, arriving at 3:00pm was not a good idea. He was very anxious, and the waiting was hard on him. At 3:10pm they decided to begin since the kids were stimming by the minute. There were about 10 kids and 5 instructors.
And so the problems began right away. One of the lifeguards in the water, we will call her Maggy, was instructed to stay with Kai until it was "his turn." The instructors then took turns with the kids doing their thing. There was a little girl we will call Lilly. "Lilly, what a great job you are doing!" said the head instructor. She had been in the water 2 minutes and was showing off her gloriously learned strokes already. "Way to go Lilly" called out another instructor from afar. Gee, I sure hope my Kai learns all of that at camp. So awesome!
Kai was not being taught so he would go to the edge of the pool and jump in. In his world, this was awesome! Woohoo! He gets to splash and play, what's not to like? Well, if you ask the screaming camp director, lots. "Kai, no jumping in!" "I said, NO jumping!". What is happening here? I thought. No one told him not to jump in initially and screaming across the pool will not register with him. Have these people taught autism kids before? How about going up to him, looking him in the eye and telling him firmly what the rules are. "Lilly, that was awesome!" screamed another instructor. Then there was Nico. Nico had been having a "turn" and then asked to sit nicely while the other kids, not Kai, but the other kids had a turn. "Wow, Nico, you are doing such a great job, let's go back in again." Meanwhile, Maggy now had a soft hold on Kai so that he would not run off and jump in the pool. 3:23 rolled by, 23 minutes later, and Kai was STILL being held in the corner by Maggy and not one person had come to get him to "teach" him. He was actually being quite patient considering he was in the same spot with one person in the water doing absolutely nothing. This was just the first class.
Walked up to the main lifeguard, Lola, as she screamed at Kai who had managed to break free and was happily running into the pool via their beach entry. "No running!". Kai's "running" was more of feet flat, shuffling into the water than it was "running."
"Listen," I said, "if you need him not to run or jump in you are going to have to pull him aside in the water and explain it to him. It might take several times before he gets it. Screaming at him from far away will not do a single thing. He has no idea it's directed at him. Also, he has not been active since class started". "Great job Lilly!" called out yet another instructor from far away. Also, Lilly, Nico and most of the other kids have gone out several times, and no one has come to get Kai yet. "The reason he is off and doing his own thing is because there is nothing else for him to do! If someone was working with him he would not have been able to run off." "Ok" she replied."I will tell them something". Lola walked up to the head instructor and with her back to me repeats what I said. The instructor gets a look of "Oh no she didn't" and says to her "Well, that's not how it works around here." Repeat to thyself, patience, patience, patience.
Was this really happening? This is how it was mostly for 6 weeks. There were maybe 2 classes when he got a fair shot at swimming and instruction just like the other kids. That's it. Since this was a trial for me anyway and I had already paid (I thought it was non-refundable), I took it as a free play activity for my son, and I figured I was going to just attend and let it go. There were other incidences. The one that always upset me the most was just how much time alone he spent or getting screamed at for doing his own thing when not being "taught." I don't think it's rocket science. You either have the child with you to teach, or you don't. When they had him, he did great, and I have that on video. When they did not, he played on the beach entry or wanted to jump in (as he does at home and all the other schools and field trips he has attended). I also have that on video. He already knew how to swim, and this class was supposed to define those skills, but it never did.
At one point the camp was short staffed, and the director was on her cell phone on the lifeguard stand. My son was all alone by the entrance. It was a joke. In another instance, the director's grandson was in the water with our kids, and he was having "turns" too which took away from our kids. The day of the last class I discussed some of these concerns with another parent who agreed with some of it and had been oblivious to others. "Lilly's" mother overheard and "tattletaled" 4th-grade style to the director. I sat there in disbelief of what was going on. Now I could be wrong, but I saw her casually backup into my conversation with the other parent to get within earshot and then watched her hightail it to the director who was not happy. I don't care that she overheard because it's something I had already mentioned to them as a concern and something I would (and did) say to their face. "I tell you, that woman, from the first day..." is the most I lip read. Any chance this was not about me? Maybe. Or maybe not.
I have been a dance instructor all of my life. I have taught small, typical kids. I know all about being fair and making sure each child is paid attention to and taught. This was NOT the way things were done at this camp amongst other issues. I also know that there are days when you or your staff can be off, but if it's the majority of the time, then there is a problem.
When the six weeks were up, my son had learned NOTHING. I left and quietly decided to just let it go as another one of those "live and learn" autism experiences where a therapist or school is not as qualified to teach our kids. That was until a parent asked about this company on a Yahoo group to which I belong. I did not hesitate to write about my story to this parent and the other group members. I made sure to say that perhaps if you paid for a one to one their experience could be different. I did praise the instructor that worked with him for those precious 5-10 minutes of instruction in the 45-minute class span. This is a parent group where parents share their experiences with autism-related things such as therapies, therapy centers, teachers, therapists, community events, shadows, etc..Another parent who attended the same camp forwarded the info to the camp owner. I wonder who? Hmmmmm.
The thing is, I had been upset all summer, and I tried to keep a lid on it in an attempt to just deal with it patiently and give them more time to get it right or just finish the camp. But, now someone wanted an opinion. I have a right to give my opinion of a business. I was not a happy "camper." Pun fully intended. That is why there are places like Yelp!, Google search and Trip Advisor. People are free to express how their experiences were with any business.
The owner wrote me what I guess she thought was an intimidating later or a cease and decease type of thing. Ha! Really? Sorry, you weren't happy so now shut up about it? Not in a million years. I am not going to go out of my way to tell the world my experience, but if someone asks, I will. Did I mention my husband is an attorney? I know I was doing nothing wrong by sharing my experience. My son is 9. Can you imagine how much therapy and classes he has taken over the years? Not all has been perfect every time. With that said, need I state that every single teacher or therapist has always loved him to death for being such a great little boy AND student? This was the first time he had been ignored or scolded so much for no good reason. She was so blindly upset that a lot of points in her letter had nothing to do with what I wrote. I wish she would have just said something along the lines of "I apologize for your experience. I don't remember things happening that way. I wish we could have talked about this some more so that I could have made your experience at our camp a pleasurable one." THAT would have been an excellent way of telling me off! (since she is also entitled to her opinion...lol). I thought long and hard how to respond or if to just let it be. I responded briefly and just went over a couple of the points and how I disagreed. I kept it short and to the point. I knew it would probably fall on deaf ears (or eyes), but I just had to reply. Such a sad situation for all involved.
I don't like anything about autism. There are some things though that in cases like these are a blessing. The only happy camper in this situation was my son. He had/has no idea that the camp was supposed to be different. If I took him to that pool today, he would be ecstatic and be anxious to do the same thing all over again. For that, I am so happy. At the end of the day, HE is all that matters.
In an interesting turn of events, I enrolled Kai in an amazing summer camp weeks after that incident. This was a camp full of activities and one of the perks? He got to swim each day with the counselors. By the end of camp, my son was swimming correctly, forwards, backward and even underwater. To that I say BOOYAH! See what happens when you " teach"? Amazing isn't it? What a concept.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
TIME
August 2007.
That's when I first started this blog.
That was exactly four years ago.
That was three years AFTER "the diagnosis."
That's a total of 7 years of dealing with the crap that is AUTISM.
If you need a refresher, here is the link to my first post ever.
http://asdqueenbee.blogspot.com/2007/08/first-official-post.html
I just turned 40. Reaching such a significant milestone made me stop and take a look back at my life a bit. Where have I been? What have I done? Reading my first post on this blog makes me cringe. At the time I was about to enter the lowest of my lowest points in my life. I had no idea I was drowning. Looking back at all the posts since then makes me want to cry along with that girl typing away. In a way, I needed this blog. I needed to vent and express all that I was going through. It's not that autism has gotten easier. Actually, I still can't put my finger on exactly what IT is. Autism still sucks. I still have low points. The difference is that maybe now I can handle it a little more gracefully. Just a little.
My husband and I have realized that this is not a short-term issue. We have realized that we have spent the majority of our 30s swimming against the current, not making it very far and almost drowning. It's hard to parent and live when you are exhausted from "swimming." We all know that 80% of marriages of autism parents do not make it. Who wants to be a statistic? Sometime last year my husband and I took a step back and decided that we were going to keep swimming, but we would do some things differently. We were going to take self-imposed timeouts to play. Adult play. You know, dining? Movies? Something OTHER than autism? What a concept! We rallied our troops and realized that we have a LOT of family support in terms of babysitting. At least more than the average person. Instead of staying home after the kids have gone to sleep, we go out. We have actual adult conversations. We have wine. Lost of wine. Sometimes, we even travel. Gasp! Yup, travel.
It could not have come at a better time. Taking these timeouts has made us more patient, loving and level-headed. We are not letting the anger consume us anymore. We are allowing it to fuel us to continue on a more positive path. Positive. Did I just type that? Wow. Of course, we still lose it from time to time. We cry, we scream, and we curse autism. It sucks you know. But all I am saying is that it has gotten...BETTER.
I have met a couple of moms recently who have told me they look up to me. Me? Really? Why? Don't they know I am a mess? Surely they don't mean me. But, it seems as though I have grown out of a lot of the autism grief and started controlling it instead of letting it control me and my life. It has been quite an eye-opener. I was also talking to a very old friend today. She reminded me just how far I have come. "You are smiling again," she said. "There were a lot of things you use to say years ago that made me realize just what a bad place you were in and I just listened and supported you." If you read the first line in my first post from 2007, it says "Flash that million dollar smile." It was a reference to a high school yearbook phrase used to describe a photo of mine from 20 years ago. Phew! That was a long time ago. For a long time there, I did not know where that girl went. Where was she? Who was this other person taking over her body?
I owe part of my "improvement" to Quinn's birth too. Quinn is such a happy little boy. He lights up any room with his smile and attitude. We worked hard for Quinn and although it has been tough and he is not exactly out of the autism window yet, he helped put things into focus. Knowing Kai and Quinn will potentially have each other as companions for life puts me at ease a bit. Comparing Quinn's life to Kai's I have been able to make level-headed decisions that will benefit them both and ourselves. I am also more focused because of them.
Kai is always improving. He is currently attending an amazing summer camp where he has learned how to swim underwater! My little Nemo! He is reading at an upper 2nd-grade level and doing 1st-grade math (although he is going into 4th grade). He speaks more fluently now and exhibiting a lot of new cognitive skills. Yes, he is still following a holistic protocol, attends an ABA-based school, does hippotherapy and attends a weekly social group. But, I don't know what has worked or what has not worked. I do know that besides all the treatments and therapies we have thrown his way, TIME has helped and been key. Is there a common denominator here?
TIME
It has worked for me.
It has worked for Kai.
I hope the 40s bring more positive into my life than it did in my 30s. I am welcoming it with open arms because frankly, my feet hurt. They hurt from kicking so much ass lately. Oh yeah, you read it correctly. Cheesy, but I mean it. Bring it on. I am ready. New decade. New me. For me and for my kids because now, I am smiling again.
Oh, and in case you were wondering about the adorable PEACE LOVE AUTISM logo I used above for this entry, here is the scoop:
My "sister" blog, PUZZLE PEACE NOW, is owned by my best friend and partner in crime. It is all about what brings we ASD parents "peace" on this crazy journey. She is also a very talented blogger unlike myself (please spare comparisons..be nice!). Also, you can pick up one of those logos as your very own CAR MAGNET! Time to lose that old school blue puzzle one you have on your car and pick this one up! Hurry! Go read!
That's when I first started this blog.
That was exactly four years ago.
That was three years AFTER "the diagnosis."
That's a total of 7 years of dealing with the crap that is AUTISM.
If you need a refresher, here is the link to my first post ever.
http://asdqueenbee.blogspot.com/2007/08/first-official-post.html
I just turned 40. Reaching such a significant milestone made me stop and take a look back at my life a bit. Where have I been? What have I done? Reading my first post on this blog makes me cringe. At the time I was about to enter the lowest of my lowest points in my life. I had no idea I was drowning. Looking back at all the posts since then makes me want to cry along with that girl typing away. In a way, I needed this blog. I needed to vent and express all that I was going through. It's not that autism has gotten easier. Actually, I still can't put my finger on exactly what IT is. Autism still sucks. I still have low points. The difference is that maybe now I can handle it a little more gracefully. Just a little.
My husband and I have realized that this is not a short-term issue. We have realized that we have spent the majority of our 30s swimming against the current, not making it very far and almost drowning. It's hard to parent and live when you are exhausted from "swimming." We all know that 80% of marriages of autism parents do not make it. Who wants to be a statistic? Sometime last year my husband and I took a step back and decided that we were going to keep swimming, but we would do some things differently. We were going to take self-imposed timeouts to play. Adult play. You know, dining? Movies? Something OTHER than autism? What a concept! We rallied our troops and realized that we have a LOT of family support in terms of babysitting. At least more than the average person. Instead of staying home after the kids have gone to sleep, we go out. We have actual adult conversations. We have wine. Lost of wine. Sometimes, we even travel. Gasp! Yup, travel.
It could not have come at a better time. Taking these timeouts has made us more patient, loving and level-headed. We are not letting the anger consume us anymore. We are allowing it to fuel us to continue on a more positive path. Positive. Did I just type that? Wow. Of course, we still lose it from time to time. We cry, we scream, and we curse autism. It sucks you know. But all I am saying is that it has gotten...BETTER.
I have met a couple of moms recently who have told me they look up to me. Me? Really? Why? Don't they know I am a mess? Surely they don't mean me. But, it seems as though I have grown out of a lot of the autism grief and started controlling it instead of letting it control me and my life. It has been quite an eye-opener. I was also talking to a very old friend today. She reminded me just how far I have come. "You are smiling again," she said. "There were a lot of things you use to say years ago that made me realize just what a bad place you were in and I just listened and supported you." If you read the first line in my first post from 2007, it says "Flash that million dollar smile." It was a reference to a high school yearbook phrase used to describe a photo of mine from 20 years ago. Phew! That was a long time ago. For a long time there, I did not know where that girl went. Where was she? Who was this other person taking over her body?
I owe part of my "improvement" to Quinn's birth too. Quinn is such a happy little boy. He lights up any room with his smile and attitude. We worked hard for Quinn and although it has been tough and he is not exactly out of the autism window yet, he helped put things into focus. Knowing Kai and Quinn will potentially have each other as companions for life puts me at ease a bit. Comparing Quinn's life to Kai's I have been able to make level-headed decisions that will benefit them both and ourselves. I am also more focused because of them.
Kai is always improving. He is currently attending an amazing summer camp where he has learned how to swim underwater! My little Nemo! He is reading at an upper 2nd-grade level and doing 1st-grade math (although he is going into 4th grade). He speaks more fluently now and exhibiting a lot of new cognitive skills. Yes, he is still following a holistic protocol, attends an ABA-based school, does hippotherapy and attends a weekly social group. But, I don't know what has worked or what has not worked. I do know that besides all the treatments and therapies we have thrown his way, TIME has helped and been key. Is there a common denominator here?
TIME
It has worked for me.
It has worked for Kai.
I hope the 40s bring more positive into my life than it did in my 30s. I am welcoming it with open arms because frankly, my feet hurt. They hurt from kicking so much ass lately. Oh yeah, you read it correctly. Cheesy, but I mean it. Bring it on. I am ready. New decade. New me. For me and for my kids because now, I am smiling again.
Oh, and in case you were wondering about the adorable PEACE LOVE AUTISM logo I used above for this entry, here is the scoop:
My "sister" blog, PUZZLE PEACE NOW, is owned by my best friend and partner in crime. It is all about what brings we ASD parents "peace" on this crazy journey. She is also a very talented blogger unlike myself (please spare comparisons..be nice!). Also, you can pick up one of those logos as your very own CAR MAGNET! Time to lose that old school blue puzzle one you have on your car and pick this one up! Hurry! Go read!
Monday, June 6, 2011
Disney Cupid Shuffle...
We survived Disney again!
Phew! Did not think we would but we did! Of course, now I don't think I want to go back for a while. The thing is, it was exhausting to go with both kids. Quinn is too small to truly enjoy it and having him in the stroller just slowed us all down.
Kai loved it of course. He visited his usual faves: Small world, carousel, teacups and the character meet and greets. We also stayed at the Nickelodeon Suites (do not recommend), and he met the characters there as well.
I was reading over my last Disney blog posts, and we have sure come a long way! Kai is just such a different child now. So much more aware and mature within his autism. Meaning, he is nine but acts like a four-year-old instead of a two-year-old. I can say we are now seasoned Disney parents. I have also become inspired to write a Disney 101 for parents of kids with autism so look out for that sometime in the near future. (I would say soon, but with my record, that could be December!)
The thing I will remember most about this trip though has nothing to do with Disney.
While getting ready for dinner one night, I heard someone in the other room singing "to the right, to the right, to the right, to the right." I stopped what I was doing and run into the other room. When I asked the other adults about it, they shrugged their shoulders and said they thought "it was perhaps the tv." I insisted that it sounded like Kai. I pulled Kai over and asked him to do "to the right, to the right." He looks up at me, smiles and starts singing and dancing! If you don't know because you have been living under a rock, go to YouTube and search CUPID SHUFFLE. Yes, that is what he was doing! Who taught him that? Where did he pick it up? I instantly remembered that he had been working on a secret project for the end of the school year show. I e-mailed the teacher about it, and sure enough, she confirmed they had been working on it for a while.
That same night, hours later, as we got back from dinner, just as we are literally stepping out of the car we heard the cupid shuffle playing loudly by the hotel pool. I rushed Kai over, and he stood there frozen with a huge smile on his face. He could not believe his eyes. There happened to be a Girl Scout party at the hotel pool with a DJ, and about 80 little girls were doing the cupid shuffle right in front of us. We could not enter because it was a private event, but we had a front and center view from the corridor. We started dancing along with them as we both smiled ear to ear. What a great moment! Completely random, but oh so fun! His eye gaze kept shifting from them to me as he danced.
A couple of days ago we attended the actual end of the school year show where he did a great job on the stage performing it for everyone. It was amazing to finally see him participate in something most kids have been doing since Kindergarten! He is now in 3rd grade. Most enjoyable of all was to see him beaming and doing it without assistance.
So there you have it. Something always comes from these trips I love to love and love to hate. We always have a lot of firsts while in Orlando and not sure why that is. The magic of Disney? Who knows. I do know I will remember that moment forever.
Kai loved it of course. He visited his usual faves: Small world, carousel, teacups and the character meet and greets. We also stayed at the Nickelodeon Suites (do not recommend), and he met the characters there as well.
I was reading over my last Disney blog posts, and we have sure come a long way! Kai is just such a different child now. So much more aware and mature within his autism. Meaning, he is nine but acts like a four-year-old instead of a two-year-old. I can say we are now seasoned Disney parents. I have also become inspired to write a Disney 101 for parents of kids with autism so look out for that sometime in the near future. (I would say soon, but with my record, that could be December!)
The thing I will remember most about this trip though has nothing to do with Disney.
While getting ready for dinner one night, I heard someone in the other room singing "to the right, to the right, to the right, to the right." I stopped what I was doing and run into the other room. When I asked the other adults about it, they shrugged their shoulders and said they thought "it was perhaps the tv." I insisted that it sounded like Kai. I pulled Kai over and asked him to do "to the right, to the right." He looks up at me, smiles and starts singing and dancing! If you don't know because you have been living under a rock, go to YouTube and search CUPID SHUFFLE. Yes, that is what he was doing! Who taught him that? Where did he pick it up? I instantly remembered that he had been working on a secret project for the end of the school year show. I e-mailed the teacher about it, and sure enough, she confirmed they had been working on it for a while.
That same night, hours later, as we got back from dinner, just as we are literally stepping out of the car we heard the cupid shuffle playing loudly by the hotel pool. I rushed Kai over, and he stood there frozen with a huge smile on his face. He could not believe his eyes. There happened to be a Girl Scout party at the hotel pool with a DJ, and about 80 little girls were doing the cupid shuffle right in front of us. We could not enter because it was a private event, but we had a front and center view from the corridor. We started dancing along with them as we both smiled ear to ear. What a great moment! Completely random, but oh so fun! His eye gaze kept shifting from them to me as he danced.
A couple of days ago we attended the actual end of the school year show where he did a great job on the stage performing it for everyone. It was amazing to finally see him participate in something most kids have been doing since Kindergarten! He is now in 3rd grade. Most enjoyable of all was to see him beaming and doing it without assistance.
So there you have it. Something always comes from these trips I love to love and love to hate. We always have a lot of firsts while in Orlando and not sure why that is. The magic of Disney? Who knows. I do know I will remember that moment forever.
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Disney bound...here we go again..
Not sure what I was thinking...
A big group of our friends is driving up to Orlando to celebrate one of the girl's birthdays. 27 of us to be exact: 14 adults, 13 kids.We waited until the last minute to make the decision. We figured we would "try." Worst case scenario, we can hide in our rooms and give the kids free range of the I-series: iPad, iPhones, iPod and I-DONTCARE!
I rearranged our schedules today so that my husband would pick up Kai and so Quinn's therapies would dwindle from 3 to just 1.
Of course, I should not be blogging. I should be packing. Procrastinating the inevitable, I guess. Just the thought of the amount of packing we have to do makes me nauseous. Traveling with an almost 9-year-old on the spectrum, a 2-year-old with developmental delays, a Disney hating husband and an SUV packed with every single thing you can imagine is just NOT easy.
For starters, both kids are on a mostly organic, gluten, soy, peanut and casein FREE diet. This means we take everything AND the kitchen sink. OK, not really but almost. Yes, there are things you can now get at most resorts for them to eat, but you still need most of the stuff because of the "what if" factor. What if they don't have it or you can't dine at the time they have? The kids can't wait or starve because we all know that equals: tantrums! Shoot, I have a tantrum too if I can't eat. Of course, I am a mom. I am entitled to one too right? And mostly because it's my job to pack all of this stuff. But I digress....Luckily, the hotel we are staying at has a full kitchen. Phew! I hate having to take the toaster oven each time in the past. What a pain. This time I can leave the pots, plates, etc. behind! I still need to take a GFCF loaf of bread, their hummus spread, pasta noodles, tomato sauce, goat milk, bananas, cereals, chicken nuggets, waffles, crackers, tater tots, pizzas, applesauce, baby food, baby bottle, ice packs, cooler, lunchboxes, etc. and that's off the top of my head. It also means I have to not only prepare breakfast in the morning, but precook and pack what the kids will be having for lunch each day to take with me in the morning. Nothing spontaneous here like a hot dog or cotton candy! Oh no! Not us.
Traveling with the baby who is only crawling right now means taking a bag of toys to spread out through the room. The hotel says the crib "is not guaranteed" and "we can only request one upon checking in." This means we have no choice but to take the portable crib with the corresponding mattress, sheets and the baby's mobile. Phew. Then there is the topic of CLOTHES. I will spare you my story on how much I like to take on trips. Really. It's better not to tell you about it. Let's just focus on the baby wearing 4 outfits a day. Oh yes, at least 4. There is the morning outfit, the nap pajamas, then the afternoon outfit and the night pajamas (thicker). It's only 4 if he didn't poop, pee, drool or dirty one of them during one of those meals I so lovingly prepare at 7:30am. In which case, backup outfit # 5 appears. Yes, I do not like toting around a dirty toddler. Which leads me to BIBS! When traveling with a teething baby, you are guaranteed soaked bibs or shirts. We established I don't do dirty babies, so I have to carry at least 5-6 per day and a bunch of the disposable ones for meals.
Then let's talk about my monkey. We have to make sure the chargers are packed, the Nintendo and charger, the Leapster and charger and the DVDs for the car. It's that or "charge it!" said by him at least 30 times in a minute until it's charged. Good times.
Last fall we made a similar trip with the same group of friends, and we vowed never to do it again. They all sat around, drank piña coladas and beer, read books as they watched their kids splash in the water and called out orders and scoldings from their chairs. My husband and I had one kid each. My husband shadowed the ASD one, and I watched the then 15-month-old who refused to peacefully nap under the umbrella and sheet we had prepared for him. How do normal people do it? Wow. I cannot imagine not having to worry about meals because you can just walk into a restaurant and eat or wait for a table to be ready to do so. Only having to pack your clothes. Nice. Walking around without having to be physically prompting the kids and actually having your personal space at all times. Speechless. Heaven.
Personal space? what's that?
I rearranged our schedules today so that my husband would pick up Kai and so Quinn's therapies would dwindle from 3 to just 1.
Of course, I should not be blogging. I should be packing. Procrastinating the inevitable, I guess. Just the thought of the amount of packing we have to do makes me nauseous. Traveling with an almost 9-year-old on the spectrum, a 2-year-old with developmental delays, a Disney hating husband and an SUV packed with every single thing you can imagine is just NOT easy.
For starters, both kids are on a mostly organic, gluten, soy, peanut and casein FREE diet. This means we take everything AND the kitchen sink. OK, not really but almost. Yes, there are things you can now get at most resorts for them to eat, but you still need most of the stuff because of the "what if" factor. What if they don't have it or you can't dine at the time they have? The kids can't wait or starve because we all know that equals: tantrums! Shoot, I have a tantrum too if I can't eat. Of course, I am a mom. I am entitled to one too right? And mostly because it's my job to pack all of this stuff. But I digress....Luckily, the hotel we are staying at has a full kitchen. Phew! I hate having to take the toaster oven each time in the past. What a pain. This time I can leave the pots, plates, etc. behind! I still need to take a GFCF loaf of bread, their hummus spread, pasta noodles, tomato sauce, goat milk, bananas, cereals, chicken nuggets, waffles, crackers, tater tots, pizzas, applesauce, baby food, baby bottle, ice packs, cooler, lunchboxes, etc. and that's off the top of my head. It also means I have to not only prepare breakfast in the morning, but precook and pack what the kids will be having for lunch each day to take with me in the morning. Nothing spontaneous here like a hot dog or cotton candy! Oh no! Not us.
Traveling with the baby who is only crawling right now means taking a bag of toys to spread out through the room. The hotel says the crib "is not guaranteed" and "we can only request one upon checking in." This means we have no choice but to take the portable crib with the corresponding mattress, sheets and the baby's mobile. Phew. Then there is the topic of CLOTHES. I will spare you my story on how much I like to take on trips. Really. It's better not to tell you about it. Let's just focus on the baby wearing 4 outfits a day. Oh yes, at least 4. There is the morning outfit, the nap pajamas, then the afternoon outfit and the night pajamas (thicker). It's only 4 if he didn't poop, pee, drool or dirty one of them during one of those meals I so lovingly prepare at 7:30am. In which case, backup outfit # 5 appears. Yes, I do not like toting around a dirty toddler. Which leads me to BIBS! When traveling with a teething baby, you are guaranteed soaked bibs or shirts. We established I don't do dirty babies, so I have to carry at least 5-6 per day and a bunch of the disposable ones for meals.
Then let's talk about my monkey. We have to make sure the chargers are packed, the Nintendo and charger, the Leapster and charger and the DVDs for the car. It's that or "charge it!" said by him at least 30 times in a minute until it's charged. Good times.
Last fall we made a similar trip with the same group of friends, and we vowed never to do it again. They all sat around, drank piña coladas and beer, read books as they watched their kids splash in the water and called out orders and scoldings from their chairs. My husband and I had one kid each. My husband shadowed the ASD one, and I watched the then 15-month-old who refused to peacefully nap under the umbrella and sheet we had prepared for him. How do normal people do it? Wow. I cannot imagine not having to worry about meals because you can just walk into a restaurant and eat or wait for a table to be ready to do so. Only having to pack your clothes. Nice. Walking around without having to be physically prompting the kids and actually having your personal space at all times. Speechless. Heaven.
Personal space? what's that?
So why do it? Why put ourselves through the misery? I don't know. I know I space out vacations enough to forget about the bad experiences and just reminisce looking at the old photos of the beautiful ones. Perhaps that shimmer of hope that maybe this time, it will be different. This time it will be worth it.
I know the last couple of times Kai has done amazing at the park (Magic Kingdom). We have been able to diminish the negative autism behaviors down to the bare minimum. It will be the baby's first real trip since he slept through the last one at eight months. We will also try to visit Universal. Our hotel, the Nickelodeon Suites, has an extensive pool and water slide area that will be our refuge the next four days.
For old times sake, these are the links to my last two blog posts on Disney trips:
http://asdqueenbee.blogspot.com/2008/07/big-disney-news-and-more-updates-on-us.html
http://asdqueenbee.blogspot.com/2008/02/not-so-magical-disney-trip.html
Not sure what's in store for us but, I need to end this post so that I can go pack.
Will check back once we return.
May the Disney pixie dust be with us!
Tootles!
I know the last couple of times Kai has done amazing at the park (Magic Kingdom). We have been able to diminish the negative autism behaviors down to the bare minimum. It will be the baby's first real trip since he slept through the last one at eight months. We will also try to visit Universal. Our hotel, the Nickelodeon Suites, has an extensive pool and water slide area that will be our refuge the next four days.
For old times sake, these are the links to my last two blog posts on Disney trips:
http://asdqueenbee.blogspot.com/2008/07/big-disney-news-and-more-updates-on-us.html
http://asdqueenbee.blogspot.com/2008/02/not-so-magical-disney-trip.html
Not sure what's in store for us but, I need to end this post so that I can go pack.
Will check back once we return.
May the Disney pixie dust be with us!
Tootles!
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