The not so magical Disney trip

Our January Disney World Trip

Thursday: My husband, my mother, my son, and I left at around 2:00pm. My son fell asleep right on time as we drove north. Two and a half hours into the trip, we had to make a potty stop. The hubby came around to get our son just as I mistakenly locked the car doors. Silly me, I thought the hubby had everything with him. After all, how could he possibly come get our son, go back to get his wallet and the keys with him in tow. That's what he did and I locked us out. I took him to the potty and I then remembered we had Onstar. The hubby had already figured it out and was calling them. Just like the commercial, the door was unlocked in under 2 minutes. CLICK! Amazing! Way to save the day OnStar! I was ecstatic. We arrived at the hotel just a half hour later. Three hours of trip time. Not too bad. The weather was hideous in Orlando. I should have known then it would be a "stormy" weekend (in every sense of the word).

We settled in with all of our stuff: the infamous cooler we always carry with all of his food and refrigerated supplements, a toaster oven, and all of the other must-haves for all the just- in-case scenarios. We ordered a fridge and microwave as well. Because, you know, we don't have enough crap with us already. We all headed to Downtown Disney, after what seemed like forever in the room organizing our son's stuff, making his food (in a space of about 3" x 24"). Downtown Disney was right down the street and we made it there quickly. As we got out of the car, it started to drizzle and it never stopped. We walked to Wolfgang's and sat right away since we had reservations. Dinner was really good, as usual. My son ate his food. We had heated his food at the hotel. Afterward, we got out his DVD player as a reward. He seemed to become increasingly attached to the player as the vacation went on. The more people around, the more he used it to tune everything out. Once we finished dinner, he rode the train and the carousel. We walked around some, went to the toy store, and headed back to the hotel at about 10pm. All night long, my mother had a whole lot of opinions to share on just about everything we did or didn't do. "Put the sweater on him," "Watch his hand," "Don't do this," "Don't do that," "It's raining," "He is getting wet." Blah, blah, blah. I secretly hoped it would be the last of it, but it was not even the first of it.

Friday: We all woke up at about 8:30ish and did the usual morning stuff. We had awful coffee at the hotel. We also had to fill up the cooler with ice. The fridge was not cold enough for all his stuff, that sucked. The hubby was bickering with my mom all morning over the darn ice and what the best way was to put store his food. Oh joy! I was bickering with her to stop telling me what to do, how to dress my child, and how to f'in feed him. At least my monkey kept asking to go see the "castle." After repeating it for him constantly, he was apparently finally understanding where we were and where we were about to go. We left at 10am to Magic Kingdom. It was really ugly outside. The drizzling and 90% humidity was daunting. So much for all the winter stuff I packed. The weather channel anchor had mistakenly said it would be nice and in the 40s. Not so! We parked and took the tram. As we waited for the monorail, Kai announces he wants the "potty." I had no choice but to ask him to please hold it. Poor thing, it was probably extremely hard for him to do it. The hubby rushed to the potty with him, once in the park. Meanwhile, I went to Civic Hall to renew our Guest Assistance Card. This is the part where I heard the angels singing. Without this card, we would NOT be able to visit the Magic Kingdom at all! I always take my old one. This make the renewal process much easier. I am serious when I say this is the single most important thing we need during this trip. I would have left back home had they not issued it! Walked out, showed him the castle and his face was just in awe, that is, until he forgot about it minutes later. Sigh. We went to the tea cups for the first time. After the Pooh ride, we won Year of a Million Dreams extra hour in the park on a non-extended hours day. BUT, we gave them to some random family because our plans for that night were not to this park :( Oh well. With our guest assistance card, we were able to use the handicapped entrance, be in a separate waiting area that would not be so crowded and be allowed in first to make sure there was no breakdown for all rides. At most, we waited 5 minutes or so. The park was insanely packed though. I will NEVER again go during a long weekend for sure. No way! Headed to Dumbo. Right as they sat us in and it elevated it started pouring! Why not? Bring it on. Whatever. We got soaked. I was really trying to be positive here.Went to the carousel which he loved and finally to the Small World ride. He was now in heaven for sure. When we came out, we could not find the stroller. It was about 15 minutes, but with our son it felt like an hour. He screamed repeatedly for his "wagon" and the cast member who moved it could not find it. Finally found the damn thing as our munchkin was now in full tears. We headed to lunch at the Liberty place. While we wait, we saw The Rock!!! I forbid the hubby from going up to him since he was with about 12 family members. I did not want pandemonium for this guy. Lunch was yummy! I went back to It's a Small World and then watched the 3pm parade. He loved the last float with all the main characters.This was the first parade that he has actually LOOKED at in the 5 times or so that we have been to MK since he was born. He usually cries or buries his face in the stroller. He walked up to the castle afterward and with a very worried face asked " Mickey Mouse?" It was so cute! In his mind, this is where Mickey lives.

Did some shopping and left by 4pm. Again, bickering between hubby and my mom, my mom and I, non-stop. For every decision or comment I would make, she countered with a differing opinion and it was pissing hubby off! It's hard to take in all the nice things when all of this is the backdrop. Back to hotel and took forever to get the mouseketeer to nap. We showered and left to the Contemporary for Chef Mickey's dinner with the characters. Shopped a bit, watched the fireworks from the lobby and then back to the restaurant to sit. Almost immediately the characters started to come by. No time to eat. He did not like Goofy at all! My mom, of course, wanted him to eat at that precise moment. "Who cares if the characters are here, I want to feed him." "Really? Is this what we are doing here at Chef Mickey's? Feeding him? Silly me thought it was for him to meet the Disney characters! Go figure" Stupid. My son in the mean time was too overwhelmed and hid behind the DVD player. Taking it away resulted in a floor tantrum which made every one around us miserable. It was a lose/lose situation. I think even Mickey was annoyed. But, hey, we continued to take pictures with the characters and make it the best we could. Goofy? Nope. Donald? Nope. Mickey? Nope. He would not pose, so we did instead. He did like Minnie mouse a lot. The food was pretty average. This was the worst character dinner ever. Not because of my son's lack of interest or my mother being a PITA but because they just walk around, no show or anything like that. I envied the happy families who sang songs at the dinner table, ate ice cream peacefully on Mainstreet and the kids who begged to buy stuff at the shops. It all seems so normal and so far from our relationships with our son and family circle. Anyway….

Back to the hotel, exhausted mainly trying not to blow up and ruin our vacation. I mean, my mother was on overdrive this trip. She usually has bad moments and then calms down but not this time. Had it been hubby and I alone, it would have been more intimate and a much smoother trip. To add to the fun our son had not pooped. Poop is important as well all know ! By not detoxifying, all the crap (pun completely intended) is inside of him and makes him act out. He also does more stimming and becomes very hyper. But wait, there was still Saturday to go, woohoo!!!

Saturday: Good morning to all! He woke up super irritable from the get go and no poop yet. More stimming, throwing himself full body against the bed and all that fun stuff. Left at 8am to MGM. Foggy morning and 60 degrees though the forecast was for 80s, rain and cold weather at night. Get to the Jojo character breakfast he had loved last summer. They sat us at the wrong table. Then they sat us in a table in a corner, which hubby did not want. Lastly, we get our third and final table. He ran over to June and is mesmerized, for a couple of hapy minutes only though. He wanted her for him and wants to dance with her which was great. After that, he wanted nothing to do with Jojo, Goliath and the others. Nothing. He even shoved poor Jojo and pulled Goliath’s tail (OK that part was funny)! So again, he hid behind the DVD, we adults took pictures with the characters, my mom gave her opinion of what we could have done differently and all her expert opinions and it was just such joy. Hubby sat pissed off because he does not want to be there. He wants to be home watching football. He paid for us to do this and he could care less about the characters this time around and he is about to kill my mother. I am in the middle of them both, trying to console my son and wanting to choke my mother as well. We left to the Playhouse Disney Show and IT”S F'IN CLOSED! You would think they would have told me that or I would have read that with all my Orlando message board research! Fabulous. I somehow find energy to try to make the best of our day and suggest the Little Mermaid show. We went in and minutes in he hates it and starts to scream (during the silent breaks) “WAGON! OUT! BYE BYE! ALL DONE! CAR!” We request to be let out of the auditorium and leave. He screamed all the way back to the car. Once in the car, it was like nothing had happened. The weather was getting crappier by the minute. Found a Walgreens and bought some glycerin suppositories to make him poop and head back to the hotel. All the way back, my mom continued to talk about why she thought he had not pooped, what we should have done, what he was thinking, and all the wonderful unsolicited comments. Hubby went under the covers to shut everyone out once back at the hotel. I put the suppository in and then wrote in my travel journal, my mother, you guessed it,  kept whining under her breath and we all waited for him to poop.

Half an hour later, there was poop! The stimming remained though which was so difficult to watch and take. It can break anyone down watching your child act like a complete lunatic! Finally, I lost it. I didn’t scream like I usually do. I just cried. So frustrated. I fed him while crying and warned them both to stay the hell away from me and leave my son and I alone. After that moment of drama for me we packed and went back to Disney though that had not been the plan, but we could not stay holed up in the room. Now, it was 80 degrees and muggy and we were wearing the 60 degrees clothing. Our parking spot was in HAPPY 79. Just perfect! Happy? God sure is funny. These Orlando forecasters have it all wrong. Went to Fantasyland and rode teacup and Dumbo where, guess what? IT STARTED TO RAIN AGAIN! Unbelievable. This time we had no hoodies on, so we were officially soaked. Did more of the same rides from the day before and ended with It’s a Small world again and he still loved it! Finished and waited 30 minutes for the castle show to start. In those 30 minutes my mother cried, said this life was a punishment for her (personal drama I won't get into here), called me inconsiderate, denied being opinionated (huh?). I ignored her and sat with my baby boy while we waited. I was hearing her complain to hubby, but I was spent. No more blow ups for me. He told her she needs to find her place and let me be the mom whether she agrees with my tactics or not. This went on the entire time. It took every inch of me to not throw her into the Disney pond. The show started and he was super happy and dancing. That is, until the witch part came out when he started crying, wanting to leave and refusing to look at the show, with his eyes shut closed. So frustrating. To add insult to injury, like I posted before, the cast kept chanting "dreams can come true" over and over which got me to choke back my anger and tears over this messed up weekend. Finished the show and did one more ride before deciding to beg the lady at the Mainstreet restaurant to move up our 7:40pm dinner reservations to 5pm. She complied, yeh! I had to pull out the "my son has autism" card so that she would understand my urgency, but whatever works at this point. Sat by 5:30pm and had a quiet dinner with a perfect view to the castle. It was a brief moment of heaven. We even saw some fireworks from the castle show while dining. That was a happy couple of minutes. I was just drained. Trying to stay positive and taking my trip in, but all the bickering made it hard.

When done the hubby wanted to leave back to the hotel. I stupidly insisted we stayed, again, trying to be positive. I wanted my son to see the Spectro parade with all the lights. We walk and find a perfect spot to wait for it and it started pouring. Not raining, pouring, lightning and all. After waiting 20 minutes hopeful it would somehow stop, they announced the parade has been cancelled. Pure human hysteria. Imagine every single person at the park attempting to exit at the same time! Had we been single we would have dashed to the deserted rides. My son is freaking out because his legs are soaked and we attempted to pull out ponchos and umbrellas while running to the monorail. He hated my bright yellow poncho and my convincing him that mommy wanted to be Big Bird was not working. It was a human herd. We made it unto a monorail and followed the massive lines for the parking trams. Only 5 were working! It was about a full hour before we got on one. One hour of my son having a “I am wet, tired, no nap, annoyed, sleepy, get me the hell out of here” meltdown. His shrieks were so loud that I know everyone around us wanted to kill us. We got those "looks." We finally got on our tram and made it to the car and the hotel. Insert BIG breath here. Took turns showering and we all hit the bed and passed out. No energy to even fight anymore.



Sunday: Of course, wake up to a gorgeous morning in the 40s, beautiful blue skies and sunny. Hubby in a great mood because we are going home. I wanted to take advantage and do another park (yeah positive me), but I had it with him wanting to not be here and my mom so I bitterly agreed to leave. We still have 2 more days on our pass so I hope to use them in the summer either alone with my son or with hubby too. Home by 1pm and that was that.

Ah, the joys of family vacations...

Three hours to pack! I admit, I'm a girly girl and did pack a zillion things, but the three hours of packing was not my stuff...it was mostly my son's!

I requested a microwave and fridge for the room. In addition, I took the toaster oven to make sure all of my son's food was prepared and ready to go as needed. I took his morning cereal and bowl, soy milk, plastic cutlery, disposable plates, ziploc bags, aluminum foil for the toaster oven, endless bags of his GFCF pretzels, cookies, fruit compotes, tapioca bread, peanut butter, tater tots, chicken nuggets, waffles and vegan cheese. Also his lunch box, thermos, sippy cup and a 24 pack of purified bottled water. Most importantly, all his supplements had to go on the trip as well. One big cooler full of ice for all the cold items went on vacay as well. My son's diet is limited to these items as of right now. It's all he will eat and it's all GFCF No, we were not moving in, I swear!

We timed the drive there so that he would nap in the car. It was really only a 1.5 hour drive and he only napped for the last half hour. Luckily, the lack of sleep did not really hurt him later. He jumped on the bed the minute we walked into the room and had a blast doing so. We don't mind either. He gets such a huge smile on his face!

We had to take a tram to reach the beach. This meant WAITING in line. He was a little antsy, but the tram came fairly fast with no chance to really have a meltdown. We spent the afternoon on the beach watching the sunset. Beautiful.


He insisted in going into the water and did so up to his waist! Of course, once he was over it, he wanted "all done with pants" (even though he was wearing shorts) and we could not take it off because my hubby had taken his diaper off and forgotten to put something else on him. (Have I mentioned he is not yet potty trained? He won't go while wearing clothes, which is good and an improvement from before, but not potty trained yet.)



He stayed in his wet shorts and we waited for the tram to take us back. This time, it took a good 15 minutes which in autism world means 30 minutes or more. He kept pulling our hands and saying "bye bye." We did explain what was going on, but he didn't understand. Have you ever spoken English to someone who does not speak the language? Yeah, that's how it goes except he also cannot comprehend or reason. How is that for fun?

Once again, right before a meltdown happened, the tram magically appeared and all was back to normal. Phew, dodged that bullet. Back to the room for family dinner. Decided to order in and relax this night.

The next morning we also had breakfast in and then headed to the pool. My son, who we lovingly nickname Nemo because of his love of swimming, wasted no time and went right into the pool with my husband. The pool was still not getting sun and still quite cold, but he did not care. My husband had the good idea to take him on the hotel slide with him. That spooked him and now he did not want to come near us in fear we would attempt to take him on again. It was fun spending an hour trying to rebuild the trust that, hey, we just might not be after him for that. Spent most of the day switching on and off with my husband going into the pool with him. In the back of my head I kept fearing any additional stimming and behavior that all of the excessive pool chlorine would cause. But tried hard to have a relaxing time in spite of constant reminders that we are just not that "normal" of a family.

For instance, it was not fun when my son playfully splashed water at a girl twice his size and shoved a little boy. In his world, this was his way to interact with them. He did it all with a proud smile on his face. Not one mean bone in his body. We ran to the rescue, had him apologize to the kids and showed him (attempted to anyway) the proper way to interact with them. Luckily, the kids were sweet and patiently sat back as he did all these things. He would repeatedly attempt to get near the slide landing to feel the water as it rippled, which of course is dangerous. My husband had to keep swimming in to fish him away from there. This was over and over, all afternoon. There was a piña colada for my husband and I somewhere in there. We still attempted to get some sun and get into the tropical vibe. Called it a day late in the afternoon and headed back to the room for baths. I put my son down for his nap and my husband escaped for a massage while I showered.

Once my husband got back, I prepared dinner for my son in the room and then we headed out for our dinner. Found a really cool restaurant which is Italian and sushi bar all at once! Walked in and panicked when we realized there was live music. My son loves to hum and hold his ears when this is the case. We figured we would try it anyway.The host said our son was "the cutest thing she had ever seen." I think so ;) Of course it helped he was wearing his "Sorry girls, I only date models" tee. They walked us to a perfect table: by a window, away from the main dining room and near a wall with a plug on it. This way my son could look out the window, be as loud as he wanted without disrupting anyone and we could plug in his DVD player without the fear that the battery would die. Yeah us. As usual, we delayed bringing out the DVD player as an exercise of patience for him. He sat without holding his ears! This was great. He alternated between sitting and bopping his head to the music and looking out the window. He did good and perhaps the longest he has gone without flipping out. Once the food arrived, we finally took out the DVD player and it was heaven. He was able to focus by having the DVD player there with him. Sort of like his crutch. To our surprise, he kept dancing in his seat. He did it even to Brown Eyed Girl. Woohoo! Had an amazing dinner overall complete with wine, dessert and coffee! Left back to the hotel where my son ran around the lobby having a jolly ol' time.

The next day we did our morning routine. We packed and headed downstairs to catch the  tram to the beach. We got our chairs and hung out most of the day. It was a beautiful day. We alternated between being in the water and out. My son was too tired at times and would sit and lounge on the chairs just like us. We could not interest him in his bucket and pail but we kept trying repeatedly. It was a picture perfect day all around until it was time to leave. We walked to pick up the tram back to the hotel and there were about 20 people in front of us. As is customary with some autistic children, routine is huge. My son was now used to walking, picking up the tram right away and leaving. Not today. There was a long, 
hot wait. After he realized we were just standing there, he started to throw his head back in full screams, tears and even some kicking. I attempted to kneel down to eye level and explain in brief that the "choo choo" was coming and that we had to "wait." The more I attempted to explain, the louder he screamed, so we let him. We stood there poker faced while he went insane. I refused to walk away and show him that by doing that he got to step out of the line. Of course, I am sure everyone in line hated us. To our surprise, the family in front of us with two kids around the same age as our son used our situation to explain to their kids that this is how "they" look when they tantrum. LOL Made us feel like we had someone who understood. And their kids were typical! It was finally out turn. Like an automatic switch, the minute he saw the tram he smiled and was an instant angel. Phew! Got back to the room, where we did had his bath routine and then naps for all.

My turn for the massage this time. Very well timed I should add. I ran there, well not really but I wanted to. I walked to the spa and had a deep tissue massage and a pedicure. Heaven! I did not want to leave. They pretty much threw me out because it was closing time. So long peace! I felt rejuvenated and ready for the rest of our trip.I walked back in and my husband had fed our son dinner. Wow! This was great! We changed and headed out for us to have dinner. I wish we could do joint meals, but it's too hard with our son's diet. We found an Outback Steakhouse and had another nice experience. Other than him standing up in our booth a bunch of times, it was nice. I am thinking the key is to go to loud restaurants. Seems to work out good for us. It's so sad when the waitresses always offer us kiddie sippy cups, crayons and coloring pages. We always take them and attempt to use them with our son, but he doesn't care for it yet and certainly does not drink out of a straw.

We went back to the hotel after dinner and off to bed shortly after packing for the next day. At about 4am our son decided to get up and sing and dance. I guess he didn't get the vacation memo...sigh.....he was having the time of his life too! He finally nodded back to sleep again and woke up at 9ish. Yes! We managed to sleep some. Eventually we headed down to the pool again and had a small breakfast there. He was not as into the pool this time around so we decided to just leave back home. Once home, he picked up on his regular daily routine immediately.

I realize now that it was actually a good getaway. It's just hard to remember this while you are going through it. It's hard to let go and relax and I can only do so in hindsight, you know? I am learning to embrace the experiences rather than fear them. I do it all in the hopes that one day my son can enjoy them and tell me so. Wouldn't that be something?