Update on us

Grunts? I will take them.

It seems my little monkey is truly trying to communicate with us more than ever before. When disciplining him it goes something like this:

Me: Don't touch

Him: (Insert grunt here)

Me: I said don't touch the _________

Him: (Insert more grunts here)

and so on.

It's annoying, but very cute that he is trying to "answer." He just can't find the words.

We have recently given him "I am sorry" and "OK mommy" to work with. He already picked up "I am sorry" or like he says "A- sorr."

There is continued progress in slooooooooooooooooooooow teeny steps.

He has also been saying "Are you OK?" instead of "I am not OK" It's his FIRST ever attempt to tell us something is wrong. Therefore he says "Are you OK?" and we reply "Are YOU OK?" and then there is silence, but at least we now know when something hurts or is wrong.

He actually had a fever on Tuesday morning and he told us in the middle of the night with his "Are you OK" phrase. He stayed home from school today and he was doing his "nose" stimming  Then he said "Are you OK? Ears!" so that's some progress, right? In the past, he has complained about his ears, but each time we take him there is no ear infection. I'm not sure what is going on there. Hmmmm...

In another improvement as of late, he is now drinking completely from cups without any prompting! Such a simple thing that took so long to master.

I am anxiously awaiting for summer to begin to start his 20hr ABA weeks. I have high expectations from this, being that 10K will be going out the window. :( It is the most expensive therapy yet!

We took away all soy! The only thing remaining now is soy lecithin. That's it! Soon we will find a nice recipe for air; there is not much more left!

Oh and this is the best one: He can now draw a happy face! Yup! He says:

"Circle, 2 eyes, nose, and a happy face (smile), ears and hair!"

They have been teaching him at school. I asked him to draw a circle and he drew the happy face and I could not believe it!

So, all in all, it's been going good. Still very slow and have not found our miracle but I will take anything that comes our way!

Green, three -eaded kids and the birthday parties

Ahhhhhh the business of kid's birthday parties!

While most parents of normal kids plan and stress over the details for a birthday celebration, they are unaware of how equally stressed we parents of kids on the spectrum are as well. 

For us, no detail must be left behind. Everything has to be perfectly planned and timed in order to ensure my child is in the best mood. The special gf/cf/sf foods have to be prepared ahead of time and into my son's lunch box. Once there (while other parents hang around, drink, eat, and socialize) my husband and I take turns being my son's shadow.  We must make sure he does not push anyone (new phase), take someone's toy (imagine the joy of explaining the sharing concept once again to my son in mid-party), or put himself in a position to endanger himself (such as pushing a chair to climb the pool fence or run away).

It's with much joy that I put our family in these situations over and over. I am kidding of course; it is a much dreaded event to open invite after invite. I am beginning to think that perhaps it's best to just stick with "my own kind." You know, parents of other autism kids who get it or just stop attending parties altogether. 

We recently had a party "incident." My son cried from start to finish. I finally had it and left abruptly. Why? Well, he did not like the generator noise the bounce house was making. All the happy-happy-joy-joy guests tried guessing why my son was in full tantrum. "Oh, he is hungry,"  "Afraid of balloons," "It's too hot." Such great pearls of wisdom. I know they meant well, but forgive me for not wanting to hear it as I tried to help soothe my son's behavior in 95 Miami, Florida heat. 

The very latest one started out as a good one for my son. Bounce house, outdoors setting with a nice breeze, and a perfect sunny day. The first thing he did was run for the pebbles and throw one in my friend's pool- a habit we have been battling for a couple of months now) I got that one under control and he thankfully moved on to something else. The bounce house was a hit this time. He jumped, climbed, went down the slide, and had a blast. Silly us, we thought it would all be smooth sailing that day.

Fifteen to twenty minutes into the party, he found a toy activity table he liked and almost took it away from a 10 month old (who was using it as a stabilizing tool to stand up). I say "almost" because, of course, we autism parents were watching like a hawk and stepped in right in the nick of time. We saved the day, the 10-month old's face, and moved on to the next scenario.

I have to note that my son has been to this house before. In it, there is a playroom and a big TV. He has played inside and watched this TV before. None of it was available on this day because the party was completely designed to be outdoors only. Not great for us, but the host's right to do so. The problem was, I was not aware of this prior to the party (and had I known I probably would not have been able to attend). It became a big problem when my son decided he now wanted to go inside to continue playing. 

Go along with me here. If you have a child with autism, you know that explaining things to a child severe cognitive delays is like talking to the wall. In his world, I am the one keeping him from going inside. It's black and white. I can speak slowly, attempt to draw it for him, and keep explaining until I am blue in the face and it will not work. Adding to the problem were the extreme loudness outside (which might have started to overstimulate him), and the Florida sun beating down on us. Did I mention receptive speech is also not his forte?

We tried for about twenty minutes to chase and redirect him to different toys. We also took short breaks in between to sip some water and catch our breath. He finally realized we were purposely not letting him go inside the house and he held on to the door for dear life attempting to enter the house.

If you can please, for one second  imagine my husband pulling my five-year old off the door and him screaming like we were killing him. I believe there was a record scratching-moment of pause at the party when everyone turned to see who was screaming so loudly. 

We finally decided to pack it up and leave. I understand the party rule was no play inside the house. We did try. But I also know I could not explain this new rule to my son especially given he had been inside so many other times. As we were leaving, I briefly mentioned the reason we had to hastily leave to my friend. She did not extend an offer to let him go inside. I think the situation could have been saved had he been allowed to go inside. Instead, she just said "Aww, OK bye."  I wasn't go to impose and insist, so that was that. In the midst of this, we started getting side eye from some of the other parents as my son kept crying. Awesome. Just, awesome. 

This is for parents of typically developing children:

(most taken from the very popular Ten Things Every Child with Autism Wishes You Knew post that has been going around and with some added comments by me)

1. I am first and foremost a child. I have autism. I am not primarily "autistic." My autism is only one aspect of my total character. It does not define me as a person. Are you a person with thoughts, feelings and many talents, or are you just fat (overweight), myopic (wear glasses) or klutzy (uncoordinated, not good at sports)? Those may be things that I see first when I meet you, but they are not necessarily what you are all about. As a child, I am still unfolding. Neither you nor I yet know what I may be capable of. Defining me by one characteristic runs the danger of setting up an expectation that may be too low. And if I get a sense that you don't think I "can do it," my natural response will be: Why try?

2. My sensory perceptions are disordered. Sensory integration may be the most difficult aspect of autism to understand, but it is arguably the most critical. It his means that the ordinary sights, sounds, smells, tastes and touches of everyday that you may not even notice can be downright painful for me. The very environment in which I have to live often seems hostile. I may appear withdrawn or belligerent to you but I am really just trying to defend myself.

3. Please remember to distinguish between won't (I choose not to) and can't (I am not able to). Receptive and expressive language and vocabulary can be major challenges for me. It isn't that I don't listen to instructions. It's that I can't understand you. When you call to me from across the room, this is what I hear: "*&^%$#@, Billy. #$%^*&^%$&*………" Instead, come speak directly to me in plain words: "Please put your book in your desk, Billy. It's time to go to lunch." This tells me what you want me to do and what is going to happen next. Now it is much easier for me to comply.

4. I am a concrete thinker. This means I interpret language very literally. It's very confusing for me when you say, "Hold your horses, cowboy!" when what you really mean is "Please stop running." Don't tell me something is a "piece of cake" when there is no dessert in sight and what you really mean is "this will be easy for you to do." When you say "It's pouring cats and dogs," I see pets coming out of a pitcher. Please just tell me "It's raining very hard." Idioms, puns, nuances, double entendres, inference, metaphors, allusions and sarcasm are lost on me.

5. Please be patient with my limited vocabulary. It's hard for me to tell you what I need when I don't know the words to describe my feelings. I may be hungry, frustrated, frightened or confused but right now those words are beyond my ability to express. Be alert for body language, withdrawal, agitation or other signs that something is wrong. Or, there's a flip side to this: I may sound like a "little professor" or movie star, rattling off words or whole scripts well beyond my developmental age. These are messages I have memorized from the world around me to compensate for my language deficits because I know I am expected to respond when spoken to. They may come from books, TV, the speech of other people. It is called "echolalia." I don't necessarily understand the context or the terminology I'm using. I just know that it gets me off the hook for coming up with a reply.

6. Because language is so difficult for me, I am very visually oriented. Please show me how to do something rather than just telling me. And please be prepared to show me many times. Lots of consistent repetition helps me learn.

7. Please focus and build on what I can do rather than what I can't do. Like any other human, I can't learn in an environment where I'm constantly made to feel that I'm not good enough and that I need "fixing." Trying anything new when I am almost sure to be met with criticism, however "constructive," becomes something to be avoided. Look for my strengths and you will find them. There is more than one "right" way to do most things.

8. Please help me with social interactions. It may look like I don't want to play with the other kids on the playground, but sometimes it's just that I simply do not know how to start a conversation or enter a play situation. If you can encourage other children to invite me to join them at kickball or shooting baskets, it may be that I'm delighted to be included. I do best in structured play activities that have a clear beginning and end. I don't know how to "read" facial expressions, body language or the emotions of others, so I appreciate ongoing coaching in proper social responses. For example, if I laugh when Emily falls off the slide, it's not that I think it's funny. It's that I don't know the proper response. Teach me to say "Are you OK?"

9. Try to identify what triggers my meltdowns. Meltdowns, blow-ups, tantrums or whatever you want to call them are even more horrid for me than they are for you. They occur because one or more of my senses has gone into overload. Try to remember that all behavior is a form of communication. It tells you, when my words cannot, how I perceive something that is happening in my environment. PLEASE DON'T JUDGE ME. I cannot control my impulses.

10. And finally, three words: Patience. Patience. Patience.

=================================================================

That said, I was very upset and in tears as we left yet another birthday party due to behavior issues. My son did not get to see Spiderman who was making an appearance later and did not get to participate in the singing of the birthday song

Just another day of autism....
 

I sometimes think that autism being an invisible disability makes it worse. Why? People look at our son and immediately assume there is nothing wrong with him. Surely, it must be our parenting. I am going to be extreme here and a bit silly, but I  think if all kids with on the spectrum were green and had 3 heads there would be a cure by now. Seriously, stop laughing. It's a lot more acceptable to read about the 1 in 150 kids affected by autism, feel bad for a second, and go on with your day. But, if you had to look at a hell of a lot of green kids with 3 heads walking around all day, every day, something would have been done about it by now. The sense of urgency would be different. You would be reminded all the time. Isolating and discriminating against these kids would only work for so long. At the rate we are going, it won't be long before there will be a child with autism or special needs everywhere you look. 

I am tired of the lack of understanding I encounter on a daily basis. It's changing who I am. I don't want to play all sides and be a people-pleaser any more. It's much easier to come out, guns blazing, right off the bat defending the rights of my child.  Kids on the autism spectrum are not going away and I am not going to live in a bubble. Compassion and empathy would go a long way. Pass it on! 

Doc update...

Just got off the phone with our doctor regarding results on some recent blood work:

- He thinks my son might be borderline hypoglycemic. His blood sugar level was low and he says he needs to be fed constantly and with not too much sugar. Will need to do another blood test but he thinks it’s not too serious.

- One of his liver acid levels is too high and he is sending him a milk thistle/artichoke liver health

supplement to help with that. 

- His potassium is high and he says he just does not know why and that we should retest that along with the liver in about a month. I just now remembered that he eats a banana a day. Could that be it? I e-mailed him to see what he says about that.

- I messed up and there was an urine test I was supposed to do but didn’t. I forgot it. Grrrr it was the most important one! The one for the yeast! Will do that today! Geez, it's not like I have a lot to remember right?

- He says he is developing a possible allergy to soy, so to cut that 50%. I told him it’s just 2 yogurts a day and he said to cut it to 1 or cut them both out. Great. More stuff he can't have.

- Also said to alternate the peanut butter with cashew butter and almond butter so that he can stay eating it or he can develop an allergy to that as well……lovely

- There is a crab reaction showing in his food panel IgG, since he has never had crab then it comes from ME!!!!! WOW!!! 5 ½ years later????????? Incredible! (I do love crab-urge).

- I asked him about liquid zeolite and NDF Plus I read about. He says it’s “crap” and “bunk” , that the guy that presented that at a DAN Think Tank comes from a company that sells everything “pyramid” style, that it’s super expensive and that while it's not harmful- it is not worthy of looking into. I know a mom who swears by this and says it helped her son recover. It's a tug of war of the cures I tell ya. How do we know who to believe? I know people who say that about DAN docs, but here I am believing in one. What gives? I guess you can try anything once? 

He has been increasingly curious and mischievous these past 2 weeks. He gets into everything and touches everything! It's like a delayed terrible 2s which he never had. Funny that we ASD parents praise this "Yes! He is getting into trouble-woohoo!!!" To us it's a step closer to being "normal." I use the word loosely because as we all know, "normal" is just such a biased word, an open book for interpretation.

Yes, whatever "normal" is, we want it!

Diving in!

So we have waited all this time to dive into ABA and we are doing it!

I have decided to take the ABA plunge for the summer.

Not sure how we will pay for it but we will figure it out.

It is ridiculously expensive! So much so, we will be doing 20 hours a week versus the recommended 40.

I decided that this was the summer for the intensity of ABA therapy for him. I am sad he won't have the type of fun summer he usually has that, while therapy oriented, is still fun and with lots of kids. I figure the good this does should roll over to many many fun summers to come.

And it better be! With an estimated cost of about 10k , it better be or my husband will kill me!

And here I thought the $184.00 per week we spent for speech therapy was bad. Yikes!

Perhaps I can look into a second job for the summer too to help out.

We have to wait until May to go in for an evaluation. That way, they get the latest info on him. He will start the second week in June and go right up to when school starts again.

In addition, I got some information from a mom of a former student from his old school. His old classmate is now almost recovered! Wow! I am looking into the protocol they are using. It is a seven steps program. By just looking at it quickly, it looks like we have been doing the top five steps already with our holistic doctor. I am wondering if to add these two steps as well, but fearful of the combination of the other stuff he is already taking. I have to read some more on it. More in a new post later. She also recommended this ABA place who she swears by and that is who we will be using.

My question is, how do parents do it? How can parents get ABA services for their kids to happen? I think I want to set a goal that if I can recover my son, I will start my own foundation to help kids and will try to make it with the least amount of red tape possible.

We never did ABA exclusively because the school he went to for pre-school was all integrated with ST, OT, ABA/VB and RDI. He was getting a little bit of the techniques but not all the time.

This is very scary to us. 
Here's hoping it works!

The Magic Potion Lotion

I love the Authia cream. 

It's the newest thing we have added along with removing all aluminun foil from cooking any of his meals. We are also not microwaving anything anymore for him. Bye bye micro!

He is now pretty much 85% organic too. . We are only missing toys, bed sheets, mattress and clothing. As I type there is even a guy outside installing a salt water pool system.

But, back to Authia! Wow...here are some of the things he has done this past 22 days:

- Has become increasingly aware

- So much so that separation anxiety from his teacher has started. Instead of being zombied back and forth all day he is aware of where and who he is going with.

- Speech therapist said he imitated actions with Mr. Potato Head

- Two days in and up to yesterday at least has started to point to days and months during morning class ritual song.

- Played with his music drum appropiately

- Requesting "lunch time" any time he is hungry (he NEVER requests this-usually only requested pretzels)

- Started finally drinking from a cup and trying from the water bottle

- Pointed to my shirt and said "green!"

- Pointed and attempted to read some words from my PC screen

- Pointed to my car as I pulled up to the house and said "Look! Mommy!"

- When being scolded for pumping from my lotion in my bathroom he covered his face in dispair and said "Not again! " lol

- Passed his first ever reading and spelling test!

- Really trying to read words more often. This morning he read "Barney in O Square" for -Barney in Outer Space"

- Asking for his teacher when he sees her walking away

- Very curious investigating stuff all over the house

- Interested in my reading words to him

- Can untwist water bottle and pour with mostly success

- Making pretend he can blow up his big play ball (he can't do a straw yet but probably soon!)

- Kicking his ball

- Drank water from a fountain for the first time

- Said "I love you daddy"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

- Game me a voluntary, non requested BIG HUG as he said it too! ;)

Don't get me wrong, there still been hyper days and some days when the stimming drives me up the wall, but overall it has been more good days than bad. As usual, we are waiting for the "bad" to resurface because every time we start to get used to a lot of gains something goes south. 

For now, we are happy-happy-happy!

T.G.I.F

The Florida Panthers hockey game was the place we went to last night. A friend invited us to their corporate suite. Perfect! It is a decent sized room with a closed door, bathroom and just 3 steps below there are several rows of seats to watch the game in a private balcony. My little one can run all over the place, climb the seats and watch without bothering anyone. Except for the grape, he found on the floor and threw at a fan sitting below- oops-sorry sir!

He must have known something was up. The routine was different than most weeknights. By the time he woke from his afternoon nap, I was already dressed in street clothes and daddy was already home. You can tell he felt a little antsy and wanted to make sure we were taking him. He would not leave our side.

The arena is right down the street from us which is great as well. We got there in less than 5 minutes and went up the escalator to the suite. He feared the escalator initially (not sure why since he has always loved it), but got on it the second time around.

Got to the room and initially covered his ears from the loud music, but was VERY intrigued by the ice and the skaters warming up skating around. He did this the entire time on and off depending on the volume. At first, he sat and trembled a bit. I guess he was nervous but he cracked a smile as he covered his ears. The cold was unexpected too! Should have known. Duh, an ice arena? lol

Other than getting scared with the loud BOOM and crowd cheering when they scored, I would like to say that he liked it! In fact, if there was a break with no players on the ice he would get upset, request the DVD player, and start whining. But the minute they came out he would run out to see them. In case you missed that attachment story regarding DVD player please refer to the Disney post. We didn't take it so that we could break up that routine.

We didn't last the entire time, but for about an hour and a half, he was very into it all. I wish hockey had no breaks in between! Those were the hardest for us. I think, given the chance, this is something he would eventually get used to watching because of the non-stop action.

His eyes also easily followed the puck! Shoot, I could barely see where it was...lol

In other news, he had a good week in school. The teacher said he passed his first ever vocabulary and reading test with zero answers wrong!

He has also been trying to speak a little more. It sounds like gibberish but it's a lot more than before. It sounds like "ghsikhglkixhlgkhlxikdglhi MOMMY" He is for sure more aware of things going on around him and pointing to words on the classroom wall in school!

TGIF!!!!!!!!

The not so magical Disney trip

Our January Disney World Trip

Thursday: My husband, my mother, my son, and I left at around 2:00pm. My son fell asleep right on time as we drove north. Two and a half hours into the trip, we had to make a potty stop. The hubby came around to get our son just as I mistakenly locked the car doors. Silly me, I thought the hubby had everything with him. After all, how could he possibly come get our son, go back to get his wallet and the keys with him in tow. That's what he did and I locked us out. I took him to the potty and I then remembered we had Onstar. The hubby had already figured it out and was calling them. Just like the commercial, the door was unlocked in under 2 minutes. CLICK! Amazing! Way to save the day OnStar! I was ecstatic. We arrived at the hotel just a half hour later. Three hours of trip time. Not too bad. The weather was hideous in Orlando. I should have known then it would be a "stormy" weekend (in every sense of the word).

We settled in with all of our stuff: the infamous cooler we always carry with all of his food and refrigerated supplements, a toaster oven, and all of the other must-haves for all the just- in-case scenarios. We ordered a fridge and microwave as well. Because, you know, we don't have enough crap with us already. We all headed to Downtown Disney, after what seemed like forever in the room organizing our son's stuff, making his food (in a space of about 3" x 24"). Downtown Disney was right down the street and we made it there quickly. As we got out of the car, it started to drizzle and it never stopped. We walked to Wolfgang's and sat right away since we had reservations. Dinner was really good, as usual. My son ate his food. We had heated his food at the hotel. Afterward, we got out his DVD player as a reward. He seemed to become increasingly attached to the player as the vacation went on. The more people around, the more he used it to tune everything out. Once we finished dinner, he rode the train and the carousel. We walked around some, went to the toy store, and headed back to the hotel at about 10pm. All night long, my mother had a whole lot of opinions to share on just about everything we did or didn't do. "Put the sweater on him," "Watch his hand," "Don't do this," "Don't do that," "It's raining," "He is getting wet." Blah, blah, blah. I secretly hoped it would be the last of it, but it was not even the first of it.

Friday: We all woke up at about 8:30ish and did the usual morning stuff. We had awful coffee at the hotel. We also had to fill up the cooler with ice. The fridge was not cold enough for all his stuff, that sucked. The hubby was bickering with my mom all morning over the darn ice and what the best way was to put store his food. Oh joy! I was bickering with her to stop telling me what to do, how to dress my child, and how to f'in feed him. At least my monkey kept asking to go see the "castle." After repeating it for him constantly, he was apparently finally understanding where we were and where we were about to go. We left at 10am to Magic Kingdom. It was really ugly outside. The drizzling and 90% humidity was daunting. So much for all the winter stuff I packed. The weather channel anchor had mistakenly said it would be nice and in the 40s. Not so! We parked and took the tram. As we waited for the monorail, Kai announces he wants the "potty." I had no choice but to ask him to please hold it. Poor thing, it was probably extremely hard for him to do it. The hubby rushed to the potty with him, once in the park. Meanwhile, I went to Civic Hall to renew our Guest Assistance Card. This is the part where I heard the angels singing. Without this card, we would NOT be able to visit the Magic Kingdom at all! I always take my old one. This make the renewal process much easier. I am serious when I say this is the single most important thing we need during this trip. I would have left back home had they not issued it! Walked out, showed him the castle and his face was just in awe, that is, until he forgot about it minutes later. Sigh. We went to the tea cups for the first time. After the Pooh ride, we won Year of a Million Dreams extra hour in the park on a non-extended hours day. BUT, we gave them to some random family because our plans for that night were not to this park :( Oh well. With our guest assistance card, we were able to use the handicapped entrance, be in a separate waiting area that would not be so crowded and be allowed in first to make sure there was no breakdown for all rides. At most, we waited 5 minutes or so. The park was insanely packed though. I will NEVER again go during a long weekend for sure. No way! Headed to Dumbo. Right as they sat us in and it elevated it started pouring! Why not? Bring it on. Whatever. We got soaked. I was really trying to be positive here.Went to the carousel which he loved and finally to the Small World ride. He was now in heaven for sure. When we came out, we could not find the stroller. It was about 15 minutes, but with our son it felt like an hour. He screamed repeatedly for his "wagon" and the cast member who moved it could not find it. Finally found the damn thing as our munchkin was now in full tears. We headed to lunch at the Liberty place. While we wait, we saw The Rock!!! I forbid the hubby from going up to him since he was with about 12 family members. I did not want pandemonium for this guy. Lunch was yummy! I went back to It's a Small World and then watched the 3pm parade. He loved the last float with all the main characters.This was the first parade that he has actually LOOKED at in the 5 times or so that we have been to MK since he was born. He usually cries or buries his face in the stroller. He walked up to the castle afterward and with a very worried face asked " Mickey Mouse?" It was so cute! In his mind, this is where Mickey lives.

Did some shopping and left by 4pm. Again, bickering between hubby and my mom, my mom and I, non-stop. For every decision or comment I would make, she countered with a differing opinion and it was pissing hubby off! It's hard to take in all the nice things when all of this is the backdrop. Back to hotel and took forever to get the mouseketeer to nap. We showered and left to the Contemporary for Chef Mickey's dinner with the characters. Shopped a bit, watched the fireworks from the lobby and then back to the restaurant to sit. Almost immediately the characters started to come by. No time to eat. He did not like Goofy at all! My mom, of course, wanted him to eat at that precise moment. "Who cares if the characters are here, I want to feed him." "Really? Is this what we are doing here at Chef Mickey's? Feeding him? Silly me thought it was for him to meet the Disney characters! Go figure" Stupid. My son in the mean time was too overwhelmed and hid behind the DVD player. Taking it away resulted in a floor tantrum which made every one around us miserable. It was a lose/lose situation. I think even Mickey was annoyed. But, hey, we continued to take pictures with the characters and make it the best we could. Goofy? Nope. Donald? Nope. Mickey? Nope. He would not pose, so we did instead. He did like Minnie mouse a lot. The food was pretty average. This was the worst character dinner ever. Not because of my son's lack of interest or my mother being a PITA but because they just walk around, no show or anything like that. I envied the happy families who sang songs at the dinner table, ate ice cream peacefully on Mainstreet and the kids who begged to buy stuff at the shops. It all seems so normal and so far from our relationships with our son and family circle. Anyway….

Back to the hotel, exhausted mainly trying not to blow up and ruin our vacation. I mean, my mother was on overdrive this trip. She usually has bad moments and then calms down but not this time. Had it been hubby and I alone, it would have been more intimate and a much smoother trip. To add to the fun our son had not pooped. Poop is important as well all know ! By not detoxifying, all the crap (pun completely intended) is inside of him and makes him act out. He also does more stimming and becomes very hyper. But wait, there was still Saturday to go, woohoo!!!

Saturday: Good morning to all! He woke up super irritable from the get go and no poop yet. More stimming, throwing himself full body against the bed and all that fun stuff. Left at 8am to MGM. Foggy morning and 60 degrees though the forecast was for 80s, rain and cold weather at night. Get to the Jojo character breakfast he had loved last summer. They sat us at the wrong table. Then they sat us in a table in a corner, which hubby did not want. Lastly, we get our third and final table. He ran over to June and is mesmerized, for a couple of hapy minutes only though. He wanted her for him and wants to dance with her which was great. After that, he wanted nothing to do with Jojo, Goliath and the others. Nothing. He even shoved poor Jojo and pulled Goliath’s tail (OK that part was funny)! So again, he hid behind the DVD, we adults took pictures with the characters, my mom gave her opinion of what we could have done differently and all her expert opinions and it was just such joy. Hubby sat pissed off because he does not want to be there. He wants to be home watching football. He paid for us to do this and he could care less about the characters this time around and he is about to kill my mother. I am in the middle of them both, trying to console my son and wanting to choke my mother as well. We left to the Playhouse Disney Show and IT”S F'IN CLOSED! You would think they would have told me that or I would have read that with all my Orlando message board research! Fabulous. I somehow find energy to try to make the best of our day and suggest the Little Mermaid show. We went in and minutes in he hates it and starts to scream (during the silent breaks) “WAGON! OUT! BYE BYE! ALL DONE! CAR!” We request to be let out of the auditorium and leave. He screamed all the way back to the car. Once in the car, it was like nothing had happened. The weather was getting crappier by the minute. Found a Walgreens and bought some glycerin suppositories to make him poop and head back to the hotel. All the way back, my mom continued to talk about why she thought he had not pooped, what we should have done, what he was thinking, and all the wonderful unsolicited comments. Hubby went under the covers to shut everyone out once back at the hotel. I put the suppository in and then wrote in my travel journal, my mother, you guessed it,  kept whining under her breath and we all waited for him to poop.

Half an hour later, there was poop! The stimming remained though which was so difficult to watch and take. It can break anyone down watching your child act like a complete lunatic! Finally, I lost it. I didn’t scream like I usually do. I just cried. So frustrated. I fed him while crying and warned them both to stay the hell away from me and leave my son and I alone. After that moment of drama for me we packed and went back to Disney though that had not been the plan, but we could not stay holed up in the room. Now, it was 80 degrees and muggy and we were wearing the 60 degrees clothing. Our parking spot was in HAPPY 79. Just perfect! Happy? God sure is funny. These Orlando forecasters have it all wrong. Went to Fantasyland and rode teacup and Dumbo where, guess what? IT STARTED TO RAIN AGAIN! Unbelievable. This time we had no hoodies on, so we were officially soaked. Did more of the same rides from the day before and ended with It’s a Small world again and he still loved it! Finished and waited 30 minutes for the castle show to start. In those 30 minutes my mother cried, said this life was a punishment for her (personal drama I won't get into here), called me inconsiderate, denied being opinionated (huh?). I ignored her and sat with my baby boy while we waited. I was hearing her complain to hubby, but I was spent. No more blow ups for me. He told her she needs to find her place and let me be the mom whether she agrees with my tactics or not. This went on the entire time. It took every inch of me to not throw her into the Disney pond. The show started and he was super happy and dancing. That is, until the witch part came out when he started crying, wanting to leave and refusing to look at the show, with his eyes shut closed. So frustrating. To add insult to injury, like I posted before, the cast kept chanting "dreams can come true" over and over which got me to choke back my anger and tears over this messed up weekend. Finished the show and did one more ride before deciding to beg the lady at the Mainstreet restaurant to move up our 7:40pm dinner reservations to 5pm. She complied, yeh! I had to pull out the "my son has autism" card so that she would understand my urgency, but whatever works at this point. Sat by 5:30pm and had a quiet dinner with a perfect view to the castle. It was a brief moment of heaven. We even saw some fireworks from the castle show while dining. That was a happy couple of minutes. I was just drained. Trying to stay positive and taking my trip in, but all the bickering made it hard.

When done the hubby wanted to leave back to the hotel. I stupidly insisted we stayed, again, trying to be positive. I wanted my son to see the Spectro parade with all the lights. We walk and find a perfect spot to wait for it and it started pouring. Not raining, pouring, lightning and all. After waiting 20 minutes hopeful it would somehow stop, they announced the parade has been cancelled. Pure human hysteria. Imagine every single person at the park attempting to exit at the same time! Had we been single we would have dashed to the deserted rides. My son is freaking out because his legs are soaked and we attempted to pull out ponchos and umbrellas while running to the monorail. He hated my bright yellow poncho and my convincing him that mommy wanted to be Big Bird was not working. It was a human herd. We made it unto a monorail and followed the massive lines for the parking trams. Only 5 were working! It was about a full hour before we got on one. One hour of my son having a “I am wet, tired, no nap, annoyed, sleepy, get me the hell out of here” meltdown. His shrieks were so loud that I know everyone around us wanted to kill us. We got those "looks." We finally got on our tram and made it to the car and the hotel. Insert BIG breath here. Took turns showering and we all hit the bed and passed out. No energy to even fight anymore.



Sunday: Of course, wake up to a gorgeous morning in the 40s, beautiful blue skies and sunny. Hubby in a great mood because we are going home. I wanted to take advantage and do another park (yeah positive me), but I had it with him wanting to not be here and my mom so I bitterly agreed to leave. We still have 2 more days on our pass so I hope to use them in the summer either alone with my son or with hubby too. Home by 1pm and that was that.