Kindergarten Roller Coaster...

The excitement! Right? Isn't that what all parents do before Kindergarten, get excited?

Even in our autism daze we managed to get excited. Even as I pre-packaged endless snack ziploc bags with GFCF pretzels and cookies. Even as I packed the pull-ups. Even as I wrote a zillion of post it -how to- notes for his new teachers. Finally. Even as I typed an All About Me report on my son for his teacher, including a section on the GFCF diet and why he had to follow it. After all of that, I was still a little giddy that my baby was going to Kindergarten. That bubble burst really quick.

We woke up on time, got everyone ready, charged the camera and were ready to go.


Actually, wait, let me rewind

On the Friday before the first day of school was his orientation. Everyone was all smiles on our way to school to meet his new teacher, classroom, and students. We arrived and even found parking right away. Imagine that! We went to the cafeteria as told and waited for the "orientation" to begin. I never did receive my letter stating where I had to go. When I called, I was told to just go to the cafeteria where all would be explained. In a blur of PTA bulletins, uniform tables, and others we made our way through. It was now 5 to 10am and nothing. Finally, someone walked up to the mic and announced that we should all be in our classrooms or we were about the miss our orientation. Hmmm, that's odd. I asked the woman on the mic where we were supposed to be. She replied that I was supposed to go to the front office for that.


This is where the fun began. My child is now upset that we have been in the cafeteria this long and he doesn't even understand what he is doing there to begin with. I walked him out and decided to stroll the campus while my husband went to the front office to find out. While "strolling" we ran into his pre-k teacher assistant from last year. My son got very excited, left me standing there and held her hand. Now I understood. He thought he was going to school like he did a couple of months ago for pre-K. She insisted we go by to say hello to the old teacher. Rather than decline (because then he would be convinced that yes, he was going to class), I did as she asked. He was very excited. Ran and gave the teacher a big hug and said "Bye bye mommy" like he use to last semester.


I began to worry that my husband was looking for me to make that joyous walk to the Kindergarten class, so I excused us and attempted to leave. My son was not having it. He refused to leave and chose a large bean bag and book he now had found over leaving. Go figure! His teacher offered to walk out with us or else he would still be there. Sigh.


As I walked out, my husband stuck his head in and announced "He is not even registered. They can't find him in the system." Oh dear. I took a deep breath and walked over to him. His pre-K teacher told them the name of the teacher he is supposed to have for Kindergarten and they scramble some. "Oh, he has Mrs. Thompson?" No, I reply, that is his pre-K teacher. You know, the one standing next to me right now? "Oh, so he is getting mainstreamed." Are you kidding me? Are you really deciding my son's placement right now in 5 minutes because you can't find his paperwork, after months of red tape and IEP meetings? I am sure they saw the smoke coming out of my ears.

I decided to walk out and let my husband duke it out and take him to where I was told he should be at. The teacher seemed clueless and had no idea who my son was and why we invaded her class. My son, in all of this, is upset his pre-K teacher left and probably thought we were insane in all of this. Perhaps he was right. I explained to her briefly what has happened and she listened as my son walked all over the room, turned the tv on (why is there even a tv with a Barney tape in here?), touched all of the computer buttons available and scrambled all over the place. Deep breath. When finished talking to another set of parents I re-introduced myself and handed her the All About Me report on my son and briefly told her about him.

My husband walked in with the head of the ESE who apologized and confirmed we were in the right place. He joined me in what seemed like a lost cause. The teacher said we don't need anything for Monday and to just show up. She was nice but not sure if that will get anything done or how much autism experience she has... but I think not much.

We also found out that this is a combined Kindergarten and 1st grade class. Most of the kids in there were quite verbal unlike my son.

I left. After the most stressful 30 minutes I have had in a while, I burst into tears on the way to the car. Why is everything "autism" so hard?

It is now Monday morning and yes, after all of that, we were still excited. What is that saying? Gluton for punishment? Yeah, that.

There were no parking spots available. We hopped out of the car with all the bags in tow and walked to the meeting place: the cafeteria. Wouldn't you know it, the meeting place was literally next to his old pre-K class causing a lot of excitement for my son at first and then a complete breakdown when they left without him. My poor baby. I attempted to explain what was going on, but he was not having it. He was very upset about not joining his old class. The new teacher announced "OK, let's go!" She held the hands of 2 of the kids and walked. And walked. And walked without ONCE looking back to confirm the rest of the kids and parents were following. Had I followed instructions, I would have dropped him off and my son would have run off to find his old pre-K class. She would have probably had no idea! Must have been overwhelmed this being the first day and all but with these kids all it takes is a second for something to go really wrong!

I walked in to find a semicircular table and the teacher extremely overwhelmed as she attempted to get them all seated. She handed him a purple name tag and asked him to match it to the chair with the same name and color. Really? That's all it takes? I have to ask? Of course not. He took the tag and wandered around the room like I knew he would,  clueless as to what was being said. I fought the urge to go help him do it. Part of me was testing them to see how they would handle it. She didn't. The assistant didn't. No one did.

I walked over and helped him find his seat. He stayed, but not happily.

I said goodbye and peeked through the door as he sat there lost in his own world. What was he thinking, I thought?

I walked back to the car feeling scared. Do I sit in the parking lot in case he runs off and she doesn't notice? I was glad he wore a cherry-red shirt. I was hopeful he would stand out and they would notice if he was not in sight. Was he going to learn anything today?

Where was this Kindergarten rollercoaster going to go next? Up or down?